


The other side of the divide.

by Werepirechick



Series: Tetrad Unity [3]
Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (TV 2012), Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types
Genre: Brotherly Bonding, Brothers, Culture Shock, Developing Friendships, Drabble Collection, Dysfunctional Family, Family Drama, Family Issues, Feral Behavior, Gen, Language Barrier, Male-Female Friendship, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, so many issues, this is an AU of an AU okay, we've reached the nnth circle of hell
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-18
Updated: 2018-05-19
Packaged: 2018-11-15 16:12:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 15
Words: 22,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11234559
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Werepirechick/pseuds/Werepirechick
Summary: What if it had been the other way around?





	1. first meeting 2.0

**Author's Note:**

> hey, as a sort of apology, and as a celebration of this universes One Year Anniversary, i've created this AU of an AU. the idea came to me a long time ago, but never saw fruition until recently. here's the gist of it: this'll be a short drabble/ficlet series that you, my followers and fans, can request scenes of set in this universe.
> 
> a bit like The Gulf Between The Divide, but different in a sense.
> 
> please leave your suggested scenes in the comments, i'll be writing drabbles for this fic for the next... hmm... couple weeks? as i find inspiration for them/have time to write them. please bear in mind that Division Difference is still the mainverse fic and will be the AU that is continued, not this one, and please do not ask me to switch stories. thanks.

 

 

_“Hmm-hm-hm… hmm-hm-hm… hm-HMMMMM-”_

“Mikey, please stop humming. We’re trying to be stealthy.”

“Sorry Dee, just feelin’ kinda jittery right now.”

“You and me both. How about you, April?”

“I’m…” April grimaced, stepping around a clump of something disgusting. “Doing best I can, I guess.”

Donnie hummed sympathetically, and patted his new human friend on the shoulder. “We’re heading for dryer tunnels soon here, your shoes should hold up till then.”

“This ain’t nothin’,” Mikey laughed, hopping over the clump. “You should see the sewers during the _rainy season.”_

April visibly shuddered at that, and Donnie grimaced; reaching out and smacking his younger brother on the back of his head. Mikey stuck his tongue out at Donnie, but he ignored it.

He would really prefer Mikey to _not_ remind their one and only friend just where they lived, and how gross it sometimes was. He didn’t want to freak her out any more than things already had.

Like, discovering a site online with pictures posted of mutant turtles. Turtles who weren’t Donnie _or_ Mikey. Turtles who may or may not be their long lost siblings, washed away twelve years ago.

This hadn’t been where Donnie expected his evening to go, but here he was anyways. Trekking through sewers on the opposite side of the city from the lair, and searching for siblings he’d been told were dead for the last… ever, as far back as he could remember.

They’d found rough markings on the sides of the tunnels, gouges in the stone in criss-crosses. Currently, according to the maps he’d memorized before they’d travelled here, they were one level above abandoned subway train tunnels.

Which, he suspected at least, would be the most likely place to find their brothers. Or brother. There had only been one turtle caught on film, scavenging in a large dumpster.

He’d had blue eyes, like Mikey. A few shades darker, but very similar to Donnie’s brother.

Smaller than Donnie, bigger than Mikey. A wicked patch of scarring around his left eye, badly healed flesh indicating poor capabilities to care for himself. Or perhaps… just enough to save himself from a deadly infection.

Donnie pursed his lips as Mikey pried opened a hatch to descend a level. There were so many questions about their possible sibling- or siblings- and Donnie was nearly as twitchy as Mikey with curiosity.

Who was that turtle? Did he still have their other brother with him?

What sort of people had they become, without anyone to raise them?

Donnie was almost more curious about that, than he was about the Kraang who’d taken April’s father.

Using the flashlights April had brought- Mikey and April being careful to keep them away from Donnie’s more sensitive eyes- they searched the abandoned subway for further traces of life. None were forthcoming, no more gouges in the walls to be found.

Mikey was still humming under his breath, and Donnie put a hand on his twitchy brother’s shell. A shiver went through Mikey, and he flashed a grateful grin at Donnie.

Donnie smiled back, and patted his brother’s shell again. Mikey tended to get extra twitchy when the situation was tense, bouncing around mentally _and_ physically unless there was an enemy for him to focus on.

It was either hyper focus or no focus at all with Donnie’s brother. Difficult to manage occasionally, but they made do.

Speaking of…

“Mikey, stop making that sound,” Donnie said, eyes on the tunnels ahead of them. The ones a few feet for wards split into three, which left him with the responsibility of calculating which one would have the best possible outcome …

“What sound?” Mikey asked, finally stopping his humming. The sound persisted.

“ _That_ one. The weird growly one.”

“I’m not doing anything, promise!”

Donnie turned to look at his brother, searching Mikey’s expression for a lie. Mikey was holding his hands up, making his flashlight’s beam wave wildly. “I promise Donnie, I’m not doing nothin’.”

“Then if it’s not you…” Donnie trailed off, hearing the growling get louder. He slid his hand around the length of his Bo staff, and moved closer to April. “Heads up, I think we have company.”

Donnie felt more than saw April’s flinch, hiding herself behind him as the growl echoed through the tunnels. Mikey’s hands twitched over his holstered nunchucks, same as how Donnie gripped but didn’t draw his bo staff.

The growl got louder, and up ahead… Donnie heard footsteps approaching.

“Mikey…” Donnie said quietly.

“I know, Dee. I’m ready when you are,” Mikey replied just as quietly.

April’s flashlight beam was still aimed towards the footsteps, and though it wavered in her grip, it provided plenty of light for Donnie to see.

A flash of green, and a figure step out of the darkness. Still growling low and threatening.

Donnie’s breath caught in his throat.

“Oh my god,” Mikey whispered in a hushed voice.

A turtle, heavier set than Mikey and smaller than Donnie, was crouching on all fours at the end of the tunnel from them.

He- or Donnie assumed he was a he at least- had his white eyelids down, and his lips curled in a snarl. His hostile growl echoed through the tunnel, growing in volume as he kept advancing.

Donnie’s eyes skittered over the clearly feral turtle, taking in the differences between himself and the other mutant.

_-longer arms probably developed for running on all  fours, claws formed from lack of trimming, speckles likely from exposure to sunlight, a very nasty scar between his neck and his shoulders-_

Donnie’s thoughts were cut off by the feral’s exclamations, rolling trills and hisses aimed towards him, his brother, and April.

“What’s wrong with him?” April whispered, a definite note of fear in her voice.

Donnie narrowed his eyes, and slowly took his hand off his Bo staff. He chose not to answer April’s question. “Mikey, hands off the weapons. We try reasoning first.”

“Ten-four Donnie, floor’s all yours.”

Donnie cleared his throat, and stepped further ahead of his companions. “…hey there, my name’s Donnie. I don’t know if you speak English, but… we’re not here to fight. I promise. Could we maybe try talking?”

The feral’s growls eased off a bit, but the way he shifted his stance didn’t indicate any sort of relaxation.

Donnie held up his hands, making sure his movements were non-threatening. “We’re not here to hurt you. Can you understand that? We’re friends, not foes.”

The other mutant seemed to be calming down, but the second April shifted her position behind Donnie- he could pinpoint the exact moment when the feral mutant focused in on her.

 _“April-!”_ Donnie exclaimed, and that was all he could get out before the feral mutant was charging.

In a flurry of movement, the feral rebounding off the wall of the tunnel and aiming for April- Donnie grabbing April and yanking her out of the way- and Mikey leaping right into the path of the feral.

The tunnel was wide enough that Donnie could put some space between the tussling mutants and April, but it was still too close for comfort.

The feral turtle’s snarls were mixed with Mikey’s laughter, Donnie’s younger brother cackling as he evaded the larger turtle’s attacks and turned them back at him. Mikey’s hand to hand combat nearly outpaced Donnie’s- just like most of his martial arts skills did. It was fairly easy, deflecting an untrained attack at your person.

However, it seemed what the feral lacked in training, he made up for with brute force.

Mikey’s shoulder got cuffed, and Donnie could see in the smirk Mikey had that he was considering getting serious. Time to get April out of here, then; regroup somewhere they could use their weapons properly.

 _“Hold on to me,”_ Donnie said hurriedly, scooping April’s legs out from under her and starting to run.

“Wait- what about-?”

“Mikey will follow soon as he can, and I doubt our- sibling, will give up the chase that easy,” Donnie said grimly. He darted past his brother and… brother, and headed for the splitting tunnels ahead. _Which one which one-_

Donnie picked on the fly, selecting the largest one with wires along its ceiling.

Someone yelped behind them, and from the following shrieks, it wasn’t Mikey.

Two sets of footsteps started running after Donnie and April.

“They’re following they’re following _they’re following-”_

“I know!” Donnie exclaimed, trying to ignore how tightly his friend was gripping his neck. “I’m running as fast as I can!”

 _“Please run faster!”_ April replied frantically.

Someone’s footsteps got right behind them, and Donnie’s already pounding heart nearly stopped. Instead of an enemy attack though, Mikey sped right past them, cackling the whole way.

“Ha ha _oh my god-_ this guy’s _insane!”_ Mikey exclaimed, pumping his arms and legs to keep ahead of their furious pursuer.

“This isn’t funny, Mikey!” Donnie snapped.

“Well duh, but-”

A bone chilling howl echoed through the tunnel, and Donnie swore he could feel the feral turtle closing in on them.

“-this is the most fun I’ve had all week!” Mikey laughed.

Donnie didn’t have breath to spare for grumbling, but _good god_.

Sometimes he forgot that Mikey had a couple screws loose. More than a couple, really. Two handfuls probably. Very big handfuls.

April clutching her arms around Donnie’s neck reminded him that this wasn’t the moment to be debating just how crazy his brother was.

The end of the tunnel came into sight, and Donnie could see it opened up into a large area.

“Get ready, I’m going to have to throw you,” Donnie warned April, speeding up as they neared their goal.

“Wait- _wait_ _you’re going to wHAT-?!”_

Donnie’s wrapped feet met the gravel floor of the underground roundhouse, and as he spun to face the oncoming feral, he tossed April as far as he could from the danger zone.

In the slow, nerve wracking second it took for him to get his friend out of the way, Donnie drew his weapon, and blocked the tackling feral mutant. His feet skidded on the loose stones, and Donnie was nearly thrown back by the sheer strength of his opponent.

Whited out eyes glared up at him as the shorter turtle hissed balefully at Donnie.

Donnie wasn’t sure how to respond to that- _internally he was freaking out; this was going to get so complicated so quickly-_ so he opted to throw off his attacker.

The heavier set mutant slid on the stones under foot, and recovered on all fours quickly. He charged again, and Donnie noted that the feral brother he was fighting probably wasn’t the type to plan out his next moves. Head first, taking the hits as they came. He seemed a lot like Mikey, in that sense.

Donnie spun his staff, deflecting the slashes aimed his way. The feral mutant yelped, and retreated from Donnie’s stinging blows. Not enough force to break anything- that wasn’t the aim here- but definitely enough to hurt.

The feral didn’t seem terribly hurt though, just very, very angry.

Wonderful. All Donnie had accomplished was pissing him off.

Donnie readied himself to block again, but a chain snaking through the air relieved him of that necessity.

In short order, Mikey flew between Donnie and their feral sibling, and trussed the other mutant up. Seconds later, Mikey stood with one foot on the restrained mutant’s shell, grinning proudly. The feral squirmed and shrieked, writhing against the gravel floor in his chains.

“Well,” Mikey said with a huff, looking down at their capture sibling. “Now what?”

The feral jerked against his chains again, hissing and spitting furiously.

Donnie heard April getting to her feet, wandering back to their group with indistinct grumbling. He lowered his bo staff, and sighed deeply.

This wasn’t at all going how he’d wanted it to.

 

 

 

Mikey hummed to himself, filling the space around him with something other than the growling to his left.

Scuffling brought his attention back to his prisoner, and he glanced over at his nameless sibling.

He was trying to make a break for it again, straining against the long length of chains Mikey had gotten around him. Slowly shuffling his way towards the tunnels, even though a couple inches into the weird worm thing he was trying, the chains went taut in Mikey’s grip.

Mikey sighed, and tugged on the chain to pull his brother back. “Dude, seriously. It’s not gonna work the fifth time you try it. Just chill out already. Donnie and April will be back soon, and then you can all talk and shit.”

He got a rolling growl in response, and Mikey let out a long groan.

He was. _So bored._

Also kind of bummed out that his relocated bro didn’t feel like getting to know him. Mostly, the turtle on the ground seemed more interested in tearing Mikey’s throat out.

Gnarly.

The chain went taut in his grip again, and Mikey tugged his brother back from the tunnels. Wow this guy could vocalize, that was a lot angry sounds for one breath.

“You know, I could probs unchain you if you’d just _talk_ with me,” Mikey said offhandedly to his semi-prisoner. “I mean- we’re not here to, like, hold you against your will and shit. We just want to make sure you’re both alright. If the other guy is still around, at least. You got green eyes, so you probably ain’t him.”

More snarling from the feral turtle on the ground.

Mikey sighed. “Yeah, that figures. Dunno what I was expecting. I mean, you probably don’t even know what I’m saying, which really sucks. This whole thing kind of… really sucks, in general.”

Mikey scuffed his toes against the loose stone ground, his unpleasant feelings leaking out from where he’d shoved them earlier. “You were like, alive this whole time- and we didn’t even know it. How could we, it was over a decade or something ago… I missed you, though.

“Dee’s super neat, and we get on great pretty much all the time- but he’s always in his headspace, and I dunno what he’s even on about half the time. It’s kinda lonely. I always thought you guys would’ve been more like me or something, because no way there could be more than one genius in the family.

“…wish you guys had been there. Wish Don could’ve found the pictures before April did. Like, years and years before. Four probs would’ve been better than two.”

Mikey noticed that his brother had gone quiet, and glanced over at the other turtle. The green eyed feral was watching him, calmly, for the first time, and Mikey gave a small huff of laughter. “See? Talking. It’s a good thing. I mean, you’re mostly just listening, but it’s a start!”

The feral turtle shifted in his chains again, and Mikey let his brother have enough length to sit up properly. The turtle seemed less hissy now, mostly just staring at Mikey. Nice, they were making progress.

Mikey eyes were drawn to the large scar on his brother’s neck. Thick, old, and gnarled. It looked like a bite mark.

“Who did that to you?” Mikey asked, gesturing at his own neck. Mikey wasn’t the most observant sometimes, but… if he wasn’t mistaken, that bite scar matched about the size of his law line. A mutant turtle’s jaw line.

That… was kind of concerning.

The other turtle remained silent, and Mikey sighed. Progress, but small progress. He wouldn’t be getting answers for a while yet.

Mikey’s awareness twitched, even though his silent brother wasn’t moving, and he ducked to the side- _just_ avoiding what could have been a life threatening stab to his neck.

Mikey kept hold of the chains in his hands, and pivoted away from his attacker. The snarling figure slashed at him again, and Mikey calmly snaked the chain around the extended arm.

“Oh!” Mikey exclaimed happily. “So there really are two of you!”

The _new_ snarling turtle yanked at his captured arm, whited eyes glaring at Mikey. Judging from the facial scarring, this was the turtle from the video, and the one who’d led them all here.

The scarred turtle yowled, and tried to swipe at Mikey’s face with his free hand.

Mikey snapped out his leg, releasing the turtle’s hand as he did, and kicked his furious sibling across the room. “Nope! No thanks. Twinsies is fun, but not when it comes to scars!”

The feral turtle he still had captured started up that endless noise he’d been making earlier- oh ho _ho_ was this guy mad- and tried to drag Mikey off balance by yanking the chain.

“Uuuuuugh, dude, come one. _Not helpful.”_

His brother only snarled at him.

Mikey stuck his tongue out at the trussed up turtle, and then turned to deflect the knife of the other. The kunai he’d drawn made a shrieking sound as the kitchen knife ground against it. Not a fun sound to hear, ugh.

“You guys sure are noisy,” Mikey commented as he kept deflecting sloppy knife stabs. “I think we’d probably get along, since I get pretty noisy, too. If you’d stop trying to kill me, that is.”

His unnamed attacker/brother shrieked loud enough it filled the whole tunnel.

“Ha, see? Same feel, bro.”

_“Mikey!”_

Mikey turned his head, dipping backwards under the slash aimed at his eyes. “Cool, you’re back. I found the other one.”

Donnie and April ran into the room, Donnie’s bo drawn and spinning in his hands as he rushed towards them all. “Yeah, I can kind of see that! Jesus Christ Mikey- could you stop being so casual about being _stabbed?”_

“But I ain’t stabbed,” Mikey pointed out, slipping through the feral’s defenses and landing an open palm blow that knocked his air out. “He’s still trying to accomplish that.”

“Not- the- _point,”_ Donnie said, punctuating his words as he slid his staff into the fight, and landed a devastating series of hits to their feral sibling. The turtle from the video went down hard, his knife skittering away across the gravel ground thanks to Donnie’s intervention.

April cautiously picked it up by its fabric wrapped hilt, since it’d landed at her feet. She cast a nervous glance at them all.

The winded feral, and their chained up brother, screamed.

Everything went a little weird at that- for a split second, Mikey’s bones vibrated, especially in his plastron, and a bunch of incoherent instincts exploded across his mind. The most dominate ones made it out on top, those being _run run run runrunrunrunrun- FIGHT._

He moved, following partially those instincts, and threw the kusarigama chain at Donnie.

Mikey moved fast enough the remaining feral didn’t see him coming; his brother caught in the act of standing up still, while Donnie and April were shaking off the scream’s effects.

There was a moment of furious snarling, and then Mikey knocked his brother out completely. He let his feral sibling slump to the ground, feeling a little dizzy himself with all those unlocked instincts buzzing in his head.

The other feral’s defeat made the captured one go full freak out mode.

 _“-fuck!”_ Donnie shouted, suddenly realizing he needed to use full strength to keep the feral in check. In the moment of lax control, the feral turtle had loosened the chains enough around his legs to messily run. He didn’t have much chain to work with, and still ended up being pulled off his feet by Donnie.

He snarled, and kept powering forwards. Inching across the ground fast as he could.

Mikey caught on to what was happening, and backed off from their unconscious brother.

The green eyed feral ended up hunching over the unconscious assumedly blue eyed one. His lips pulled back as he panted and screeched at them all. There wasn’t really anyway he could stop them if they decided to try something, remaining tied up as he was, but he was obviously trying to protect their brother regardless.

He kind of seemed desperate, and really, really scared.

Aw jeez, now Mikey felt like a piece of shit. And this had started out kind of fun, too.

Mikey sat down on the dirty floor, and sighed heavily. “Well. What the hell do we do now?”

Donnie was looking at their brothers, and the kusarigama chain, and at April, all at once; wearing a pinchy, exhausted look.

He sighed, too. “Honestly, I’m not really sure. This wasn’t what I was expecting at all.”

“…guys, what do I do with the knife?” April asked, holding the large blade away from herself.

“You could keep it?” Mikey suggested. “Everyone always needs more knives.”

April looked a little queasy. Donnie gave Mikey a frustrated look.

Mikey shrugged. What, he was right.

Their green eyed brother gave a series of complicated snarls and harsh trills. He looked ready to tear their guts out with just his teeth.

Eh, fair enough. This’d been a shitty night all around. Mikey probably would do the same if someone tried this with Donnie.

“We could call Sensei?” Mikey said, barely heard over the feral’s angry noises.

Donnie sighed really, really heavily at that idea.

“I do not want to have this conversation. God. How do you even tell your father his other sons are insane?”

“Hey dad, turns out your other sons are insane. Should we bring them home for a family potluck anyways?”

“Not funny, Mikey.”

“Sorry, just trying to lighten the mood.”

Their feral brother growled louder at them all.

“Guys, I think I’d like to go home now. This is going outside my comfort zone.”

Also fair. This was outside Mikey’s, too.

Donnie threw the chain back to Mikey to hold onto, and started rubbing tiredly at his eye sockets. “Sorry, April. This wasn’t something you should’ve had to see. I’ll. I’ll call Sensei, tell him what’s happened. We’ll get you home soon as we can, I promise.”

“Thanks. Um. Also, the knife??”

“Right, right, just. Just give it here; I’ll… do something with it.”

Wow could their feral sibling yowl. Nice vocal cords. Mikey hoped he wouldn’t do the freaky-scream again, since he didn’t think his adrenaline needed any more boosting. He was already still twitchy as it was.

“You know,” He said to his angry, angry feral brother. “This would’ve gone so much better if you guys had just talked things out with us.”

His brother screamed something inhuman and filled with clicking trills. Donnie covered one of his ear slits and pressed the phone harder against his head. April continued to look a little queasy and a lot uncomfortable.

Mikey laughed, because what else was there to do in this situation?

Then he sighed.

Oh boy was this ever going to get complicated.

 

 


	2. cooking class

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> because someone asked about raph or leo trying to feed don and mike- i present to you Cooking Class with Mike & Raph. sort of.
> 
> idk, i'm warming up myself with this drabble. i apologize if its shit.
> 
> also: while i appreciate the general support, i've only gotten a few comments with actual prompts in them. this is a gift from me to you guys, not me spitting out whatever the fuck i feel like. gimme your wants, your desires, your wishes- i'll see which ones are granted by my finicky muse.

 

 

Mikey turned on the light of the kitchen, and yawned widely. It was pretty early in the evening all things considering, but _someone_ had to make breakfast for everyone, and someone had to do it before Leo or Raph decided to start helping themselves to things. Again.

And he’d been saving that shortcake for a special day, too.

He blearily wandered past the island table, headed for the stove and fridge to start with eggs. Then Mikey snapped to full awareness and whipped his head back towards the lumps on the tabletop.

Six dead pigeons lay on it.

Mikey stared at them, frozen.

Thankfully, none of them started twitching. They were, however, still a bunch of dead birds in his kitchen.

“Ha ha, what the _fuuuuuuck,”_ He said under his breath.

He edged towards them, reaching out to tentatively poke a tiny little head of one pigeon. It lolled to the side, and Mikey withdrew his finger. Considering the situation.

Okay so. Nasty because this was his kitchen and nonsterile dead stuff was not allowed in it, and god _dammnit-_ not more dead pigeons in his life.

Wasn’t the saying about getting the worm? And here he was, the early turtle getting the bird. He would have preferred worms. Easier to clean up.

He stooped a little, examining them closer. From the open throats of some and the odd angles to necks of others, he’d say someone had expertly killed pigeon.

Now who did he know that did that…

Easy question.

“Dude, dead shit stays out _side_ the kitchen,” Mikey said, standing up and looking towards the presence he’d caught a few seconds ago.

Raph scowled at him as he emerged from the shadows outside the doorway. Mikey rolled his eyes at the glare, because that was Raph’s perma-expression. “For serious, there’s all sorts of germs on these guys. I’m gonna have to bleach the table before we can eat on it again.”

Raph crossed his arms, hunching his shoulders and muttering something under his breath.

“What?”

 _“Food,”_ Raph spat out. “For us, for _you._ Jackass.”

Mikey kind of wanted to laugh at the jackass comment, since Raph picked up swear words like no one’s business and _loved_ to use them. Especially since it annoyed master Splinter so much.

Buuuut on the other hand, he was pretty sure this was Raph trying to contribute to their recently joined households in the best way he knew. Which was pigeon hunting.

Oh boy. How was he supposed to approach this without A) setting off another fit from his older-younger brothers, B) without offending Raph’s delicate feelings, and C) without someone getting food poisoning?

“…thank you?” Mikey said. “I’m not much of a pigeon fan, but these are, uh, a nice gift. Very thoughtful.”

That seemed to soothe some of Raph’s insult, and he nodded firmly.

“Did you go get these before I woke up?” Mikey asked, poking a pigeon again. Luke warm, so they weren’t deader than a few hours.

“Yep. Caught, br-brought back. Eat.”

Mikey started to say _no thanks,_ but then paused.

Didn’t people eat pigeons as delicacies?

He narrowed his eyes, and put a hand on his chin.

Well, that required a bit of googling.

 

 

 

Donnie blearily walked into the kitchen, yawing long enough his hearing popped. Coffee. He needed coffee.

His foot touched something soft. Soft was not how the kitchen floor should feel.

Donnie closed his eyes, already even more tired of his existence.

“Mikey. What am I stepping on.”

“Pigeon,” Raph answered gruffly.

Donnie opened his eyes, and looked down.

He was indeed standing on a scattered pile of slightly gory pigeon feathers.

He wondered vaguely how soon karma would put him out of his misery.

“Raph, Mikey, _why_ am I stepping on pigeon feathers?”

“We had to pluck ‘em, duh,” Mikey answered brightly. “You want a mouth full of fluff? I don’t think so.”

Donnie looked around the kitchen; glancing at the various spices and bowls on the counters, at the lit up oven and it’s counting down pre-heat, and at the six small pink corpses Mikey and Raph were in the process of glazing. Mikey was in his favorite blue apron, and he’d somehow managed to convince Raph to put on the frilled red one. Which was sometimes funny, but not so early in the evening _or_ under the current circumstances.

Mikey grinned at the bland face Donnie was giving him.

“It’s just like chicken, except fattier,” Mikey said, putting another brush of sauce on a pigeon carcass. “That’s what google says.”

“Complicated…” Raph muttered, eyeing the tray of poultry like it was personally offending him. Mikey reached out with his free hand and patted their brother’s cheek.

“I know, but trust me; it’ll taste really good once we’re done.”

Raph huffed disbelievingly, and chattered something Donnie didn’t have energy to try translating. Mikey grinned, and copied the sounds back at their brother, making Raph grin for a split second.

Donnie pinched the bridge between his eyes, and sighed hard. “And what happened to the removed intestinals?”

Raph gave him a confused and partially frustrated look, like he usually did when Donnie used words he didn’t know.

Donnie clarified. “I’m asking what the fuck you did with the guts, Raph.”

A meow came from the corner, and Donnie turned to find Klunk licking her chops in front of a stained porcelain bowl.

“We gave her just a little bit,” Mikey said, exchanging his sauce brush for a salt shaker. “The rest is in the garbage, I promise. But, um, you shouldn’t touch the sink for a bit. Got kinda yucky.”

“…you spoil that cat,” Donnie muttered as Klunk started licking her bowl out.

“Because she’s my baby and deserves it.”

Donnie looked at the pigeons again, weighing his options. Or rather, how many fucks he had to give.

…

Not many.

Well, at least he’d confirmed a long time ago that their stomach acid could digest just about anything.

He moved towards the coffee maker, which had come on at its programmed time and left him a god sent mug of hot caffeine. It distracted him from the imminent local cuisine he’d be subjected to in the near future.

“Just make sure you cook them all the way through,” Donnie muttered as he brought the blessed drink to his lips.

“Who do you take me for?” Mikey scoffed.

“Whiny bitch,” Raph said.

“Yeah he kinda is, but we love him anyways.”

“Hmph.”

Donnie gave his brothers a backwards V, and exited the kitchen. He didn’t glance back at the pigeons. He was already resigned to his fate.

 “Good evening, my son,” His father said as they passed each other.

“Evening, Sensei,” Donnie said in return. “And just so you know, we’re probably going to have roast pigeon today.”

Splinter gave him a confused look. Donnie sipped his coffee.

“Really?”

“Really. You’ll see the evidence of the massacre on the floor.”

Splinter’s ears went backwards, and he made a thoughtful hum as he narrowed his eyes.

“Raphael convinced Michelangelo of something, I’m assuming?”

“You assume correct.”

“…well, it won’t be the most intolerable thing I’ve ever been forced to eat.”

Donnie raised his cup to his father.

“That’s the spirit,” He said dryly.

Splinter sighed, and mumbled something suspiciously like, _“The things I do for my children,”_ as he walked away.

Donnie watched him go, and took a slow sip as Splinter walked into the room he’d just left. The sound of Mikey’s cheerful explanations and Raph’s growling chatter followed immediately, and Donnie decided he did _not_ want to be a part of that conversation.

He turned away to head towards his lab, and choked on a gulp of coffee as he suddenly found Leo right in front of him.

“Oh for- Leo, it’s _seven in the evening,_ why are you doing this to me so early?” Donnie coughed out.

Leo narrowed his eyes, and growled out, _“Where Raph?”_

Donnie jerked a thumb over his shoulder. “In the kitchen, obviously. I know you’re not deaf, so just listen for the sound of idiocy and you’ll find him and Mike.”

Leo hissed at him, and darted past. Donnie ignored the aggression, and carried on without looking back. Leo had fifteen bugs up his butt at any given time when it came to interacting with Donnie, and seeing as they’d had a whole two weeks since they’d been forced to move in together, Donnie was so, so beyond giving any shits.

He turned a deaf ear slit to the squabble that came from the kitchen, likely being Leo cussing Raph out for leaving him behind, and Mikey and their father trying to calm the situation.

Donnie took out his phone as he entered his lab, texting _so I’m probably having pigeon for breakfast tonight, here’s to hoping I don’t die. If I do, I leave my lab to you._

April texted back, _wow should I be worried about being caught in that mess?_

_Strong chance of that yes. Avoid if possible._

_Ugh. Roger that._

Donnie sighed, took another sip of his coffee, and figured even his bright spot of seeing April for training tonight wouldn’t happen.

To quote his father- the things he did for his brothers.

Donnie locked the door of his lab tight, and turned his shell on his family problems for however long remained until _City Bird ala whatever-the-fuck-was-in-the-cupboard_ was served.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> notes about this AU:
> 
> 1) Mikey kind of has a complicated view of his new sibs, since they're /supposed/ to be his big brothers, but he didn't grow up with them and they're so /new/ to civilization. he kind of feels like they're both older and younger than him at the same time, which is part of the complication to things.
> 
> 2) there will be more about Raph and pigeons soon, bc i adore those lovely little birds and also Raph's relationship with them in this AU.
> 
> 3) Leo doesn't /want/ to respect Donnie, and feels threatened by Donnie's position of authority and larger size. this results in him being hostile for a good portion of the first while. (same applies Raph's general feelings about Donnie) 3.5) Raph meanwhile finds Mikey simultaneously someone to respect but also push around/protect, because Mikey wiped the floor with him and Leo when they first met, but also is smaller and very backwards with everything he does. (from feral perspective at least)
> 
> 4) the nest fire/attack did happen in this AU as well, forcing the Hamatos to move into together in the lair. it's been a bit of a rough transition so far.
> 
> 5) Mikey is very open with getting to know Raph and Leo, and Donnie is Really Uncomfortable a lot of the time, or alternatively Too Tired To Care. its a work in progress on both ends, since Leo and Raph aren't too keen either.
> 
> 6) April is already good friends with Donnie (and also Mikey) in this AU, and i'm unsure if i'll add his canonical crush into things. i don't really like how insta-love it was, and prefer a slow burn to things if there has to be romance at all.
> 
> 7) idk there was other stuff but i thought it up last night while i was mostly asleep and can no longer recall.
> 
> anyways- remember to request stuff, thanks for reading, yada yada, love y'all bye


	3. bean bags are serious business okay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey i'm spectrum and this is jackass.
> 
> *posts a bunch of drabbles out of the blue and disappears back into the void without explanation*

 

 

It happened before Mikey could even blink.

One second, he’s ignoring the undercurrent growling between Leo and Raph as they fussed over who got to sit where near the TV- he was distracted okay? Twenty levels in and he _so_ didn’t want to blow it- and the next thing he knew, there was a cage fight going on right behind him. Just, minus the cage, and with a shit ton more primal battle screeches.

The nest/train station fire, AKA total dick move by the Shredder that Mikey was going to kick his ass ten hundred times for, had been just a week earlier and the four (five, counting Splinter) of them had managed a tense feeling limbo. Language barrier, plus fresh trauma, plus unwanted relocation, _plus_ major difficulties with socialization, which applied to all of them, was making things hard. But, they were managing. Leo and Raph had their own space, they were slowly being eased into how house things worked, and Mikey, Donnie, and Splinter were adjusting to having two snarling permanent houseguests. It wasn’t perfect yet, but they were working on it.

Mikey even actually thought they were doing alright; cultural clashes happened a lot, sure, but nothing too major. Snapping here, snarling there, sudden invasion of space on and off depending on their moods- but it wasn’t too hard to handle all in all.

Until previously mentioned cage fight happened right in the middle of the living room, and startled Mikey bad enough he got an instant K.O. on screen. Whipping his head around, every single reflex demanding he get into a defence stance, Mikey caught sight of his two older/younger brothers trying to _actively maim each other._

What the fucking _fuck._

“Guys, guys what the- _HEY!”_ Mikey got to his feet, intent on grabbing Raph by the shell and getting his freaking _teeth_ off Leo’s shoulder. “No fucking _biting!”_

He got kicked in the gut for his attempt to intervene. _Hngh._

Leo dislodged Raph from his shoulder- no blood to be seen, thank god- and punched their brother in the eye. Raph made an unholy screech, and tried (unsuccessfully) to put his claws in Leo’s throat. Cue demonic shriek from Leo, and a near strangle hold on _Raph’s_ neck as he fended off the claws.

Mikey stood outside the range of flailing limbs as his two brothers wrestled on the stone floor, hands out and with every alarm going off in his head. Zero clue how to break into things without being sucked in as well.

Sweet Christ on a cracker, _what was going on._

The lab door slid open right then, and Donnie poked his head out. His mildly confused expression turned into horror as he caught sight of the fight.

 _“Help?!”_ Mikey exclaimed, pointing.

Bless Donnie’s quick reaction time and trust in Mikey. Between the two of them, once Donnie had vaulted his way into the pit beside Mikey, they picked a brother each and dragged their feral siblings apart.

Leo and Raph were about as happy with that as Mikey was about breaking his perfect no-death streak.

Well, no. They were actually even more pissed. Ah ha ha.

Leo’s elbow met Mikey’s chin- fucking _ow-_ and he slipped the lock Mikey had on him. God damn feral fighting skills. Raph hadn’t managed to escape Donnie’s octopus hold yet, but Donnie was forced to release him regardless because a ball of pure fury launched himself at them both, and tackled Raph back to the floor. Donnie looked ready to get either his bo or a stun gun. Mikey was headed that way himself.

And then, just like that, it was over.

Mikey’s body was still flipping out all over the place, pumping adrenaline and pushing him into solely fighting mode, and then suddenly there wasn’t any need to.

Leo got Raph in a chokehold from behind, holding their brother there and growling something low and subverbal. Raph scratched at Leo’s arms for a couple seconds, and then just. Stopped. For some reason.

Then they separated, like nothing had happened. Leo dropped Raph from the chokehold and Raph took his claws off Leo’s arms. They chattered briefly, bonked their foreheads together, nose bumps right after, and then wandered back towards the bean-bag pile.

Leo sat in the huge blue one. Curled up in it, really. Raph pulled together the two smaller ones, yellow and red, and lay across them. Leo reached out and smacked Raph’s face lightly. Raph snapped at his fingers, and smacked him back. Repeat interaction twice more.

Then they proceeded to put the whole thing to rest, and act like they hadn’t just been trying to maul one another thirty seconds ago.

Mikey stood, feet apart and instinct to fight bouncing around his skull. More confused than he’d been by the ending of Black Rock Shooter.

“…what,” Donnie said softly. “the _fuck.”_

“The fuck was that,” Mikey said.

“What. The _FUCK.”_

“Oh my god.”

_“What. The. FUCK.”_

“I-” Mikey put his hands together, prayer like. Pursing his lips. “I think that was. About chairs. The beans. The bags of beans. The _bean bags,”_ He got out finally. “Oh my god that was over the _bean bags.”_

Donnie made a pitchy, pissed off sound.

Leo looked over briefly, and then went back to licking the spots Raph had scratched him. Raph didn’t even raise his head to look. Mikey’s character continued to be dead on screen and playing cheerful pause screen music.

“Why,” Donnie said, throwing his hands up. “can NOTHING, in this GOD FORSAKEN HOUSE, that I _haaaaave_ to live in, make ANY. DAMN _. SENSE?!”_

Mikey thought for a moment. His nerves calming down from _holy shit it’s a fight GET THE FUCK READY_ reactions. He glanced over at Leo and Raph; Raph who was lazily stretching, and Leo who’d curled up tighter and shut his eyes. Mikey thought a little longer, then he said,

“Well. To be fair, the blue one _is_ comfier for sleeping.”

Donnie made his pitchy, pissed off sounds again, and stormed away. Mikey kinda thought he and their brothers were a little more alike than Donnie wanted to admit.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for the people who wanted to see a little more about leo and raph's dynamic, which is essentially a weird combo of utter chill and NO CHILL AT ALL.


	4. to bite or not to bite. (leo is actually still pretty dorky even as a feral.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for people who wanted to know a little more about leo's thoughts on humans, april, and his brothers in general. set a couple weeks post nest attack.

 

 

Leo stared at the human so casually standing in his brother’s space; leaned over a _tabell_ in _Dawnie’s_ main territory within the _lay-err_.

She glanced at him, and then hurriedly looked away.

Leo narrowed his eyes, growling softly.

(“He’s staring at me again,” April whispered behind her hand.

“Ignore him,” Donnie said, hiding his embarrassment. “He just has a lot of issues with humans. And manners.”

“…do you think he’ll attack me again?”

“Not if he knows what’s good for him he won’t.”)

He couldn’t figure out why they kept letting the human back into the _lay-err._ Maybe she sometimes brought warm, hot things to eat- that Leo was always _highly suspicious of-_ but there wasn’t any real point to her being in their home, far as he could tell.

She wasn’t even all that much of a threat, so it hardly could be her _forcing_ his brothers and their rat to accept her into things. _Aprill_ was too small, too _timid_ to be any threat. Leo could kill her easily. So how had she managed to push herself into his family?

He wanted her out. Gone. He didn’t like humans and he didn’t like his human-like brothers getting any more exposure to them than they already had.

He didn’t like that she and _Dawnie_ were so friendly to each other. She couldn’t fight, barely brought back enough food for _one_ turtle to eat; how had she managed to impress someone like _Dawnie?_

No sense, nonsense. Uuuuugh.

Leo missed his nest. His tunnels. Things making _sense._

 _Out out out out out_ away, Leo clicked to himself, aiming it at _Aprill._

(“Donnie…”

“If he does anything, I’ll lock him in the bathroom again. Promise.”)

Leo would probably tolerate her more, if she’d just stop seeming so prey like. Humans were usually at least a _little_ scary; _Aprill_ tiptoed around and never carried herself as anything other than something trying to say _don’t look at me I’m not here_. All small like and easy hunting.

Leo had fought tiny four legged fluffy creatures more scary than her. Eaten them, too. Like _My-key’s_ , but Leo knew _My-key_ would probably drive him out of the _lay-err,_ and then kill him somewhere dark and alone if he touched _Clunkk._

 _My-key_ was small. And goofy. And had weird rules that were silly and never seemed to stop smiling. Except when he stopped smiling, stopped being goofy, and that was why Leo and Raph were never hurting a hair on _Clunkk’s_ head ever again.

(“…Donnie, look.”

“He also does that sometimes.”

“Oh my god, he’s so spaced out.”

“I waved my hand in front of him one time when he got like that, and he took a full three seconds to snap at me.”

“Oh my god.)

Leo paused from being angry with _Aprill_ and _Dawnie_ and reminded himself he was lucky _My-key_ was so easy-going and forgiving. Otherwise, they probably would have been dead the first night they all met.

But. Still. Small, goofy, so silly. _My-key_ seemed like a younger brother, but could act like an older brother, and was just so, so confusing.

Like _Aprill_ and _Dawnie_ being companions.

Leo went back to being mad.

(“His angry face is back again. Aw.”

“I think he might be pouting because I’m spending time with you instead of him.”

Donnie snickered. April snickered.)

Leo grimaced, watching his brother and his brother’s human laugh together. Weird and annoying _and_ confusing, that’s what they were.

He should bite _Aprill,_ again, just to remind her where she stood in the order of their home. If she _had_ to be here, the least she could do was follow the rules.

But then _Dawnie_ would put him in the water room again and probably leave him there even longer than last time. And glare at him all night, and then all day, and possibly for multiple days. Probably punch Leo a couple times during all that.

…it’d be worth it anyways.

 _Aprill_ grinned at _Dawnie,_ open and relaxed and acting like she had any right to being in their home, and Leo started growling again.

Definitely going to bite her.

(Donnie saw Leo trying to dart at April as they passed the dojo stairs. He’d known this was coming, and slid his bo staff free of its sheathe.

One two _three-_

Leo went splashing into the pool, shrieking all the way. Donnie steered April away from the mess and kept her walking until she was safely out of the lair. April was laughing despite everything, which made the stinging embarrassment of Donnie’s crazy brother lessen just a tad.

Then he locked Leo in the bathroom. Raph laughed his ass off with Mikey as he did, watching the whole show of dragging Leo into the room and shutting the door in his offended face, all without a hint of sympathy. No honor among thieves it seemed.

Leo caterwauled for three hours before Donnie unlocked the reinforced door. He was highly tempted to make it an even four just for that.)

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> prior to this point, which is a couple weeks into full-time cohabiting, leo Did Not Like donnie, and liked april even less. there was biting involved. there were bathrooms and locked doors involved. there were earplugs involved for everyone. (they joke about That Time Leo Actively Tried Biting April later on, and laugh about it, and leo defends it seemed like the logical choice at the time. april says it was scary in the moment but now she just thinks he's an overprotective dork.)


	5. just vore him and get it over with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> about ten seconds of Casey Jones' introduction to this disaster cast.

“I could just let him eat you,” Donnie threatened.

“He won’t actually eat me,” Casey fucking Jones replied confidently.

Donnie glanced at Raph, who he was still holding the arms of, seeing as he’d pried him away from mauling Casey’s face off mere minutes before.

Breaking into the home of two ferals, three ninjas, three _nearly_ ninjas, and six mildly to extremely traumatized individuals; fantastic plan courtesy of one Casey fucking Jones. Yeah, great forethought right there.

Raph shrugged. “I’d eat him,” He said calmly, unlike he’d been a couple seconds ago. He bared his teeth at Casey.

Casey suddenly didn’t look so confident.

Mikey started cackling. Leo looked like he was seriously considering breaking out of Mikey’s lockhold and actually trying to eat Casey. Their father looked on despairingly.

April sighed, and put her face in her hands. Her friends were all testosterone fueled morons.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> vore him. just vore him already.


	6. get ready, get set

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for people who wanted some more into the First Night.

 

 

Raph huddled over Leo’s unconscious form, watching the two foreign _wrong-speaking-walking_ turtles that had attacked them both. Neither of them was trying to get at him and his _stupid-bossy-beloved-brother_ , but Raph would keep an eye on them anyways. Even though they’d let him out of the metal they’d caught him in, and helped carry Leo back to the nest; he didn’t trust them at all.

Especially the small one, who was wily and did _not_ act like a smaller turtle should. Being surprisingly, horrifyingly strong and skilled. _What??_

The big one also was scary. _Big,_ for one thing. _Older,_ for another. Raph hadn’t ever met an older turtle before, not one that was as big and smart as he and Leo. It was making him nervous, to have someone so clearly older and potentially stronger than he and his brother inside their nest.

But. Raph was out numbered. He couldn’t successfully drive the big one or the small one off at the same time. He’d fight until he died, sure, but what would happen to Leo if he did? Leo would also die, and Raph wasn’t going to let that happen.

They didn’t smell like they were looking for a fight, though. Just talking in their _wrong-speaking_ language, like _humans_ did, and seeming to ignore Raph and Leo in their corner of the nest.

They probably weren’t actually ignoring him and Leo. He couldn’t see them doing it, but he could sense that they were watching him. Closely, intently. Just like Raph was to them.

Raph shifted the _sharp-cutting-tool_ to his other hand, and adjusted his position by Leo’s upper body. He was shielding the most vulnerable spots, in case the turtles actually _did_ feel like attacking.

What did they even want. Was it territory? If so, why hadn’t they just killed Raph and Leo or driven them out? Maybe they were trying to do what medium-big four legged creatures that went _bark bark bark_ sometimes did; fight a bunch, force other creatures into submission, and made a pack afterwards.

Raph was going to bite their throats before they got his, if they tried that. He’d bite them and not let go like Leo hadn’t let go of him, all those turns of seasons ago when things had been _bad_ and Leo had gone crazy.

Leo had better wake up soon, or Raph was going to bite him, too.

…maybe not so hard, but still. Biting. Because he was scaring Raph and Raph was going to beat him up for it later.

Leo shifted his head, and Raph tore his eyes away from the strange turtles to examine Leo.

His brother’s eyes opened blearily, and he took a shuddering gasp. He tensed all over, claws going into the first thing they could. Which was Raph’s foot. Ow.

 _Shh shh shhhh,_ Raph whispered, putting his free hand on Leo’s forehead. Soothing rubs, wiping dust that’d gotten stuck to him. And moving his foot out of clawing range. _Watching they’re watching_

 _Where-?_ Leo asked.

 _Nest safe home nest, not safe though strange-wrong-outsiders in nest, get up get up,_ Raph clicked rapidly, helping Leo into a sitting position. His _stupid-stupid-dearly-loved_ - _brother_ listed to the side, and Raph had to wrap an arm around his shell to hold him up.

Leo caught sight of the other turtles, and stiffened. _Why not dead why not chased out gone?_ He trilled under his breath, tense and scared. _Why still here why we still here why_ they _here?_

 _Don’t know can’t understand wrong-talking-wrong-acting turtles,_ Raph answered. _Talk nonsense talk circles, just sitting waiting watching ugh annoying scary want them GONE_

 _Want them gone too,_ Leo agreed.

_You you can fight?_

_Yes,_ Leo said, even though he had a big bruise on his scales and a wobble to his legs.

Raph would just have to cover for him, then. And beat him up for being stupid, when they had time later.

_On mark?_

_Get set!_

_GO!_

They charged in unison.

(“Oh for _fuck’s sake-”_

“Ah ha ha- I _knew_ they would!”)

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and then everyone had to beat up one another for a bit before mikey got bored and just tied his brothers up again.


	7. Fight me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wanted to save this for later, but fuck it. here's a longer scene than usual.
> 
> an unprompted but necessary Donnie and Leo scene.

When Leo appeared in Donnie’s lab, in the late hours of the night, Donnie didn’t give his brother much thought. Leo tended to wander in and out of rooms as he pleased, staying a few minutes to observe and then moving on. If Donnie didn’t interact with him, his brother would probably get bored and leave soon enough.

Of course, that only would have worked if Leo hadn’t come to stand right in front of him; directly across the table Donnie was currently using.

Leo bared his teeth at Donnie, and chattered something low in his throat.

Donnie stared at his brother for a long moment, and then said, “Go away, I can’t play right now. I’m working.” He didn’t have time to goof around; he had the mutagen to examine and a missing father to locate. Whatever Leo wanted to do, he could go bug Mikey to do it.

Leo scowled, and planted his hands on the table. He repeated the chattering, slower and more drawn out.

“…look, I know we’ve been making progress with your English and my- turtlese,” Donnie hated that word, but Mikey insisted. “but I’m still not getting what you’re saying. Speak English, if you can translate whatever it is you want.”

Leo scowled harder. Great.

( _Fighting challenge fight me I am worthy prove yourself worthy,_ Leo repeated, for the third time. _Dawnie_ kept giving him a bored and unimpressed look, and it rankled him deeply. _For top spot for leadership fight me I want to fight you_

 _Dawnie_ kept staring at him boredly.

Leo hissed. _Stupid two-leg-walking Dawnie FIGHT ME_ )

Donnie was too tired for this. He was always too tired for this.

He sighed, tempted to put down his pencil and notebook for a moment to push Leo out of the lab. “Look, whatever you want, I’m sure Mikey can do it for you. Or Sensei. I’m doing important work here, April’s father’s safety might depend on me- _HEY!_ ” Donnie lunged for the beaker Leo had smacked, catching it just before it toppled off the table. The green mutagen inside it sloshed violently, and Donnie was grateful he’d thought to cap any and all of the beakers containing the substance. “Son of a- Leo, I only have so much of this stuff! What the hell do you- _stop that right now!”_

Donnie barely caught the second beaker before it fell to the floor, shoving both of them back onto the table. He slapped Leo’s hand away from the rest before his brother could try it again. “Leo, what the _hell_ do you want? Because you have exactly three seconds to explain yourself before I _make you_ explain yourself.”

 _“Fight me,”_ Leo hissed roughly, third eyelids shut and teeth bared.

Oh for the love of god.

“…yeah, no,” Donnie deadpanned. He stood up, circling the table to glare down at his misbehaving brother. “Get out of my lab before I really lose my patience, Leo. I’m short on it lately as it is.”

Leo hissed viciously, and swiped at Donnie with his claws extended.

Donnie caught the swipe, and diverted the attack so Leo stumbled sideways. “If you want to brawl for no good reason, go find Raph. Or Mikey. Or hey, maybe even Sensei if you want your ass kicked that badly. Just get out of my lab and leave me in _peace.”_

( _Dawnie_ talked too much. He should’ve been paying more attention to where Leo’s feet were.)

Donnie’s legs were un-expectantly buckled without his say; a cord on the floor yanked forwards by Leo’s foot making his knees bend. Leo’s fist caught him in the stumble, and Donnie saw stars.

Donnie reeled, hissing in pain as his nose throbbed. His eyesight skewed for a moment, blots of light exploding everywhere in his vision. Leo, relentless, shoved Donnie backwards; further unbalancing him. Enough that he got another few punches in, to the chest and cheek.

Donnie snapped, and grabbed Leo’s extended arm the fifth time he tried for a hit.

In a fury fuelled movement, Donnie pivoted, and flipped Leo over his shoulder to the floor. His brother’s shell clattered against the concrete, and Donnie internally winced. That might’ve been a bit harsh.

(Leo’s senses filled up with pain, the source radiating from his shell. He lost his air, and choked on a cry. _Dawnie’s_ grip left his arm though, and no further attacks followed afterwards- so Leo forced himself to flip over and get back into the fight.)

Leo backed off, circling Donnie on all fours. Donnie swallowed his gut reaction discomfort at seeing his brother move like that, and focused on watching for Leo’s retaliation. He had his arms raised to protect his face and chest, and waited for another attack to his upper body.

But Leo’s attack wasn’t aimed at that; it came from below, in the form of Leo launching himself in a suddenly leap and taking Donnie at the waist. Leo’s screeching battle cries filled the air as he tackled Donnie, and his claws left stinging scratches wherever they landed.

Donnie’s shell contacted the floor, and he lost his bearings for a moment. The weight of his brother pushed all the air out of his lungs and his shell rang pain throughout his body. It was bearable, he’d felt much worse, but it still _hurt_ , and it pissed him off.

Leo had been showing interest in learning martial arts, skulking around Mikey’s solo sessions and sometimes being drawn into a short lesson by their exuberant brother. None of those meager learned skills showed now, not with Leo’s default feralness taking over. Donnie’s brother fought like a wild animal, as he had from the first moment they met, all those weeks ago.

It still twisted Donnie’s stomach, filling his chest with uncomfortable emotions he still couldn’t deal with. It made him feel ill.

Leo’s claw caught Donnie’s cheek, leaving a scratch deep enough Donnie knew it would bleed. And, in that burst of fire bright pain, Donnie snapped a second time.

If that was how Leo wanted it, then _fine._

Donnie would fight.

( _Fight me fight me TAKE ME SERIOUSLY,_ Leo howled, furious that _Dawnie_ wasn’t fighting with everything he had. He was just _laying there_ and taking it and showing none of the fighting skills Leo _knew_ he had-

He was worthy, Leo _knew_ he was worthy. Just as strong just as powerful, _Dawnie_ might’ve been older but Leo had bested Raph, who was stronger than them both in some ways, Leo could best _Dawnie_ he _knew_ he could-

If _Dawnie_ would just fight him equally, acknowledge him and his strength, Leo would show him show _everyone_ he was just as good, just as strong-

 _FIGHT ME,_ Leo yelled.

 _Dawnie’s_ hands slipped under Leo’s body, and the world flipped.)

If Leo wanted to fight dirty, then Donnie would fight dirty.

He was so sick of dealing with this; one thing after another, Leo or Raph or _both of them_ would find something to cause a fight about. With each other, with Donnie, with Splinter- the only people they didn’t actively fight with was Mikey and April. It pissed Donnie off, having to fight tooth and nail _still_ to get his brothers to cooperate with anything.

 _“Is this what you want?”_ Donnie shouted, kicking Leo’s stomach and sending his brother tumbling across the floor. “Mindless violence? Constant odds? Well fucking _fine, then.”_

Leo’s hissing sounded a little wheezy, but he attacked Donnie again regardless. Donnie didn’t even bother getting up all the way; he grabbed Leo’s shoulders as his brother charged, and knocked him over again. Donnie slammed Leo into the concrete, and didn’t give the feral turtle time to breathe before he punched him.

“Fuck you!” Donnie yelled. He punched Leo again. “I didn’t want this! You think this is any easier for me? Living with you and all your- your _freaky behaviors?_ I’m not the one causing problems, _you are!”_

Leo shrilly screamed, and caught Donnie under his jaw with an awkward uppercut. Donnie’s teeth clicked painfully, and he lifted Leo’s shoulders up again and slammed him back down. Leo choked on his breath, and Donnie hit him across the cheek again.

“I have bigger things to worry about than you and whatever fucking problem you have today! We have a hostile alien _army_ hiding in New York- and we’re the only ones who can stop them! I have training, and the cars, and April’s dad to look for- I’m the only one keeping it all working and _you-”_ Donnie’s voice dropped into a snarl. “-you’re just making everything _worse!_ It’s not my fucking fault we have to live together; I’m not the one who set your home on _fire-!”_

Leo’s claws scraped at the less protected spots on Donnie’s side, and he lost his train of thought. He yelled, wordless and angry, and hit Leo hard enough his skull bounced against the floor.

“I’m trying my fucking best to juggle everything- you and Raph and April and the Kraang and April’s father- and everything in the lair that I have to keep in working order- it all depends on me and _fuck you_ for making it harder! We’re trying to- to help you learn everything you missed out, _I’m_ trying to help you learn that all- why won’t you just _understand that already?_ You don’t- you don’t have to be this!”

Leo coughed hoarsely, red coming out of his nose.

“You could be something- _someone_ better! You have all the tools; I _know_ you’re not stupid. So why? Why do you always- _fucking- do this?!”_

Donnie’s brother glared up at him, and bared his reddened teeth in a feral snarl. Just as animalistic as he’d been when they first met, despite everything Donnie had done to try and change that.

Donnie’s fists hurt, and he felt his throat scratch dryly as he heaved breaths. He knelt over his brother, fighting the urge to snarl just like Leo was.

Then, Leo’s eyes slid away, and he turned his head. Baring his neck to Donnie. His body untensed, and went limp under Donnie’s.

(Leo had lost.

He felt shame well up in him, but he knew when he was beat.)

Donnie had won.

He didn’t feel like he had, and his stomach twisted.

“Stop it,” Donnie whispered. “Don’t do that.”

Leo wouldn’t be doing that, if Donnie had just found him years ago. He never would have at all, if Donnie had just _looked_ for them.

Leo wouldn’t look at him.

“Don’t _do that.”_

Leo kept his eyes aimed away, and didn’t even twitch a sneer.

Donnie’s vision slowly expanded, and he realized he was pinning Leo down. He shoved himself off his brother, shaking off the haze of emotions and pent up frustrations that’d seized him.

“Fuck,” He whispered.

Leo slowly sat up, careful movements and not looking directly at Donnie.

“I’m sorry,” Donnie said. “God, Leo- I’m so sorry.”

He watched his brother wipe at the congealing blood on his face. Donnie felt the cut on his cheek throb. In his chest, the feeling of despair and disappointment welled up. Both those emotions aimed at himself and his behavior.

“…I’m sorry, this is all my fault.”

Leo’s eyes finally moved towards him, and Donnie felt an unhappy twinge in his chest at the wariness in his brother’s gaze.

“I… I should’ve found you sooner,” Donnie whispered, the thought he’d been keeping to himself for so long finally pushing its way out. “I’ve- god, I’ve had computers since I was _eight,_ and I never even-” His voice wavered. “-I never even looked for you. I knew I had brothers, I knew you’d existed and I never even _checked_ what’d happened to your bodies after you got washed away. You- neither of you would be like this if I’d just- just-”

(Leo’s brow furrowed.

Why didn’t _Dawnie_ seem proud of himself, or at least satisfied to have won the fight?)

“Maybe I could’ve found you then, and we would’ve been able to rescue you, and then- you could’ve grown up here. With our- our _father,_ and Mikey, and you wouldn’t have- have become feral. I could’ve found you if I’d just looked, and you would’ve-” Donnie’s voice hitched. “You could’ve been _normal,_ or at least had a better chance at it. I’m sorry. I’m trying to fix it now but it’s _not enough,_ and every time I try you fight me on it. You fight me on _everything._ Why can’t you- why can’t you just let me _fix this?”_

(What was even going on? This wasn’t how a winner was supposed to act at all.

Winners didn’t cry after winning the fight.)

“I’m sorry,” Donnie covered his eyes, embarrassed and miserable. “I should’ve looked. I should’ve looked and I could’ve- could’ve brought you home. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry I didn’t.”

He should have looked. He should have looked and kept looking until he found them. But he never had, and Donnie’s brothers were paying for it. They were going to pay for it the rest of their live, the irreparable damage done to them by isolation and ignorance; living without proper social contact or structures.

It was his fault. Donnie was the one with the tech, the one who’d wired the lair wall to wall with wifi at the age of nine and salvaged his first working computer at eight- he could’ve looked and found them but he _didn’t_. And now his brothers were worse freaks than him and he couldn’t ever undo that fact, even if he had all the resources in the world.

He’d failed at being a leader, before he’d ever even taken the title.

He’d failed as a brother, and that was something unforgivable.

Strong arms wrapped around him, and a head was laid on Donnie’s shoulder.

( _No more fighting no more crying,_ Leo said, holding _Dawnie._ _Sorry am sorry did not mean did not want, just a challenge fight not… not hurting-kin-brother-companion fight, promise_

He’d just wanted to prove himself, not hurt his brother. Not like this. Not like he’d done with Raph.

Leo wouldn’t ever let himself do something like that again.)

Donnie lowered his hands, and blinked at the feral turtle hugging him.

They’d just been fighting. He bloodied Leo’s nose and yelled horrible things at him. There wasn’t any doubt Leo’s shell and jaw were smarting.

…why?

A long pause, and Donnie wrapped his arms around Leo in return.

He didn’t have to understand it to appreciate it.

“I’m sorry,” Donnie said quietly. He tried not to sniffle. “I didn’t mean to… go off like that.”

( _Sorry,_ Leo clicked. He tried not to swallow the blood in his throat. _Won’t do it again won’t be so harsh, try… other fighting-challenging ways?_ )

“…I still don’t know what you’re saying, sorry.”

( _Stupid eeeeenglish speaking nonsense no sense, ugh can’t understand more than little-small bit_ )

Donnie felt ashamed of himself. Even if Leo didn’t understand what Donnie had been shouting at him, he still hadn’t had the right to say those things. And, he was the leader of their loosely termed team. Getting drawn into a fight like that had been irresponsible and immature of him. If Leo and Raph were ever going to learn otherwise, he needed to set a better example for them. He’d faltered tonight, but he couldn’t let himself do so again in the future, not so dramatically and-

A tongue dragged across Donnie’s uninjured cheek.

He shrieked just the tiniest bit.

“- _Leo!”_ Donnie spluttered, rubbing the spot. “We _talked_ about this!”

( _Dawnie_ certainly wasn’t crying anymore at least, even if Leo got shoved away for trying to help clean _Dawnie_ up from his bizarre break down.

He clicked irritably to himself, without really meaning it. _Two-leg-walkers.)_

Donnie scrubbed his unfortunate cheek, barely mustering the annoyance it warranted. _Ferals_.

Leo made a face at Donnie, chattering something that was probably rude. At least it wasn’t the colorful string of swearwords Raph had begun to pick up, courtesy of Mikey’s movie marathons for their feral siblings.

Leo patted Donnie’s head, and uninjured cheek, and then tugged him into another hug. Donnie realized, trapped in another strange embrace, that he’d just been given a combination of an onceover and reassurance.

Sometimes, with all the fighting and snarling and prickliness in general, Donnie forgot how caring his feral brothers really could be.

A soft, warm feeling grew in his chest, replacing the unhappy pinching from earlier, and Donnie chose to hide his face in Leo’s shoulder for a bit. In a way, it was different from hugs he’d gotten from his father and Mikey over the years. After all, Leo had originally been the eldest.

Donnie couldn’t remember what having an elder brother felt like. He assumed it felt something like this.

 

 

 

Afterwards, in their sleeping space, Leo explained to Raph what he’d done and what had happened because of that.

 _Dawnie_ cried? Raph asked incredulously.

 _Crying hiding face-feelings very sad awfully sad,_ Leo confirmed.

_But won he won, why upset-sad?_

_Don’t know can’t tell, just sad so sad_

Raph tilted his head, frowning seriously. _That’s weird-strange-wrong seeming_

Leo nodded solemnly. _Won but sad makes no sense, Dawnie is strong but so strange_

 _Very strange,_ Raph agreed. _So you you lost? Could have would have told you so_

Leo scowled, and smacked his brother’s arm. _Had to try you would have too tried, fall-out-of-tree stupid Raph_

 _Would have won slip-and-fall stupid Leo,_ Raph shot back.

_No! Dawnie sad but still very strong, you me us separate can’t win would not win, you you boasting again_

Raph waved him off, rolling his eyes and being cocky. _So you you submit-agree-follow Dawnie?_

… _yes,_ Leo sighed, crossing his arms. _Challenged lost submitted, following rules until try again_

_When try again? Not before me trying first try_

Leo thought for a moment, and then clicked, _not for long long while will be trying, Dawnie gets sad and cries when challenged_

Raph scoffed. _Why care? Easier win_

 _Lost_ before _crying remember? You you would lose and then Dawnie would cry and sick-not-good feeling would come back,_ Leo pointed at his chest and then Raph’s. _You you know feeling, don’t make it happen on purpose_

_What if don’t care?_

_Then you you even stupider than I thought_

… _Mykey_ _might also be mad-sad-upset if we make Dawnie mad-sad-upset,_ Raph added, a grimace creeping into his expression. _Don’t know can’t know if Mykey would get… scary if we make Dawnie sad-mad-upset_

They shared a moment of silence, remembering the scarier side to their lone smaller brother.

 _Best not to, be waiting while instead to make sure,_ Leo said.

Raph sighed loudly. _Probably yes, don’t like but yes you’re…. right_

Leo grinned. Raph scowled, like he always did when Leo was right.

In the end, they agreed to not challenge _Dawnie_ so regularly, and avoid the consequences doing so would bring. ( _Mykey’s_ scary side, sick feelings in their chest, crying _Dawnie._ Bad things.)

But the _rat-that-is-big…_ he was still someone they would have to test some more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and thus we have an answer of why these two clash so much in the beginning; two different types of complexes were at work.
> 
> will i ever explain what happened to leo and raph when they were kids? probably.


	8. an explanation, but not much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> set during the weeks when the nest is still intact, Mikey confirms something he's suspected.
> 
> also: shout out to the AMAZING PERSON who sent me fanart of feral Raph and Leo in my tumblr inbox!! i was a mess of excitement for the remainder four hours of my shift last night, and i've printed the picture out and hung it on my wall. <333
> 
> everyone should go check out my tumblr (onthespectrumwriting) to view this beautiful piece of art! it's under the 'Division Difference tag' or under 'gifts to spectrum'. if i ever figure out how to link things in these boxes, i'll post a direct link of it.
> 
> thanks again to you, oh anonymous person. you partially inspired this chapter!

“So… what’s the big scar from?” Mikey asked, eyeing the thick and obvious scarring on his brother’s neck. “It kinda… you know… looks like a bite?”

Raph tilted his head, squinting. Looked like English to turtlese wasn’t happening quite right, darn it.

“This,” Mikey pointed at Raph’s shoulder and neck, where the bite mark was centered between. “Where’d you get it from?”

More squinting, then understanding sparked in Raph’s eyes.

He pointed at Leo, who was sitting with Donnie and having a heated debate about how to split the pizza up. (Donnie wanted equal slices; Leo was trying to take all of it except for two slices.)

Mikey internally sighed. Of course Raph had pointed at Leo.

“Could you tell me _why_ he did that?” Mikey asked, because wow. He’d seen them squabble, sure, but definitely not anything on level with that impressive scar. It was just straight up disturbing to look at, or think about; especially since he had zero context for the event it’d taken place in.

“…ssickness,” Raph said eventually, after a long moment of thinking. They were still on really rough ground in terms of translating between their languages, but they were definitely getting better. Donnie’s crash course for them was really helping, even if their brothers sometimes still resisted.

“Sickness?” Mikey prompted.

Raph grimaced, and after another moment of translating in his head, said, “Little, us. Leo- very ssick. Got. Lost? No. Confused. Hurt- me, I hurt Leo, wass very bad. Could not- tell me from...” Mikey’s brother frowned hard, clicked something under his breath, and then seemed to give up trying to translate the word. Instead, Raph gestured at his eye. “Give Leo thiss. Hurt to stop. Hurt.”

And just when Mikey had thought his brothers wouldn’t be able to top the story of their lives in isolation, Raph had to go say something like that.

Now Mikey was thinking about his brothers as tiny little turtles, sick and alone and hurt and hurting each other and _augh-_ there went his reasonably happy mood. Shit was just plain sad to think about.

He wished he’d been there, to do something. Anything. Even if he’d have been just as little as them.

“That must’ve really sucked,” Mikey said sincerely. He reached out and gently patted Raph’s unscarred shoulder, trying to not eye the other too obviously. “I’m sorry no one was there to stop it from happening. Or take care of you guys afterwards.”

Raph frowned, and tilted his head the other way. Right, no speak English too good.

“I’m just glad you guys were okay, buddy. Don’t gotta think too hard about that.”

Raph examined him for a moment, and then gave a shrug and a nod.

Mikey beamed, and set a reminder aside to ask Donnie about illness induced hallucinations.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm stringing y'all along, sorry. eventually i'll explain it properly.


	9. they had us in the first half, ngl.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> requested by LeanMeanGreenTeam: Splinter interacting with Donnie and Mikey, and a brief scenario to show how the three of them have changed bc of the AU (of an AU).

It was moments like this, that Splinter was proudest of his sons.

Donatello’s bo struck without hesitation, knocking Splinter’s sword aside to make room for Michelangelo to charge through. The two of them were using their favorite tactic, dividing Splinter’s focus and diverting it where they needed.

Michelangelo had always been gifted with martial arts, taking to it with an ease even Splinter had found himself envying. As a young man, he’d had to work twice as hard to gain the same skills Michelangelo picked up easy as breathing. It had been trial and error, finding a teaching method to suit his son’s specific learning style, but it had paid off and then some.

Michelangelo laughed as he parried Splinter’s returning attacks, bright and deceivingly carefree. His steps remained light as he spun; knocking a vicious series of blows against Splinter’s sword with his nunchaku. Splinter attempted to return the attacks again, but in a blink Michelangelo had shifted positions to the opposite side of Splinter; right back on the attack without missing a beat.

Splinter caught each swing with his katana’s edge, escaping any real damage to his person. Michelangelo was gifted, yes, but he still had a fair amount to learn, and continued to struggle with diving in headfirst into a fight. Too excitable at times, his son could get carried away and make a critical misstep at the wrong time.

Which, Splinter supposed, was what made Donatello such a perfect counterbalance to Michelangelo.

Splinter’s attention had been divided as they intended, using the distraction attack his sons favored when Donatello needed a moment to plot. But, he kept an eye on Donatello during the one-on-one fight with Michelangelo; waiting for his tallest son to make his move.

While Michelangelo fought spontaneously and wild, much like his weapon did, Donatello would hang back in interludes; setting up a series of moves up to ten steps ahead, and sometimes further, all in his mind. The bo staff was a weapon of intention and purpose- it would only break and harm what the wielder wanted it to, and each attack carried with it clear goal. Splinter’s son fought as such, in opposition to Michelangelo.

Donatello would signal Michelangelo, sometimes subtly enough Splinter missed it, and they would create time and space for Donatello to brainstorm. Michelangelo would distract all the attention he could, while Donatello picked apart their enemy’s weaknesses and plotted their plan of attack. It worked perfectly in their favor, the set up they’d created over years.

“Plan A-6!” Donatello suddenly yelled, and dove into the fight. Michelangelo disappeared like shadows banished by light, and Splinter’s attention refocused on blocking a devastating blow to his legs. Had that hit, he likely would have been icing his poor knees for at least a few evenings. Donatello did tend to fight a might dirty, all in name of accomplishing his goals.

Splinter’s son grew more talented with his bo staff, the longer he wielded it and sought out every possible way he could improve his usage of it. Martial arts did not come to him quite as simply as they did to Michelangelo, but Donatello always made up for it with studious dedication, and an inventive eye to tweak each learned attack to work better for him. It showed in the power and grace Donatello moved with; a whistling swing after whistling swing, wood hitting metal again and again as Donatello advanced on Splinter.

With hardly a sound- and only because of his mutant hearing, did Splinter notice in time- chains appeared in his vision.

He abandoned his fight with Donatello, and slipped away too quick to be caught in Michelangelo’s trap. The looping chains for Michelangelo’s kusarigama captured nothing but air, and both his sons spared breath to curse the failure.

“S-3!” Donatello called out, and Michelangelo and he attacked together as one. And as they did, Michelangelo threw down three smoke bombs.

Clever, underhanded; blinding their opponent and destroying his sense of smell. Exactly the sort of attack Splinter had come to expect from his two sons.

Michelangelo was wily, Donatello was crafty; their combined attacks were usually both such things. They made fearsome opponents, and that was why Splinter was rarely ever more proud than these moments. The moments during training, when he could feel them get closer each time to beating him.

But, tonight was not the night they would succeed, as good a plan as that had been.

Splinter shut his stinging eyes, and opened his other senses to the beings around him. Michelangelo had potential to do this properly as well, rather than on frequent accident, but that was for another lesson. For now, Splinter would remind his sons how much they still needed to learn.

A well placed punch here, a smack of his tail there- Splinter disarmed both his sons through the smoke screen they thought had obscured them completely, and knocked them both off to the side.

“Aw _come on,”_ Michelangelo whined, slumping against the wall he’d been tossed into. “I thought we had you that time!”

Splinter waved his hand, clearing the last of the fading smoke from his face. “Not quite, my son. But that was a good plan nonetheless; against a weaker opponent, the match would have been yours.”

“Yeah, but _you’re_ not a weaker opponent,” Donatello sighed, leaning on the same wall as Michelangelo and rubbing his temples. “That was an attack meant to take _you_ down, not someone else. Well. No. Someone else, too, but mostly you.” He sighed a second time. “Back to the drawing board, I guess.”

Michelangelo patted Donatello’s knee sympathetically. “ _I_ thought it would work, Dee, so good job anyway.”

“Not much of a consolation…”

Splinter chuckled. Even with their momentary failure, he could already see the gears turning in Donatello’s head as he created a new plan, and caught still fight-frenzied glances from Michelangelo. They were down, but certainly not out. Next evening, they would no doubt have come up with a new series of attacks to try and inch closer to meeting Splinter on a master’s level.

When that night came, the night they bested him, he’d be the proudest he could ever be. But also the saddest, for he knew that would be the point they no longer needed his full guidance. It would come eventually, as he’d always known it would, but not tonight.

Tonight, he was properly introducing two new students to martial arts, and there for extending his time as a teacher.

“Leonardo, Raphael,” Splinter said, turning to his untrained sons watching from the opposite wall. “What did you think? Are you interested in learning alongside your brothers?”

Raphael blinked at him slowly, and then turned his eyes to the side with a huff; watching out of the corner of his eyes, wary and vaguely disinterested. Pretense? Or perhaps genuine disinterest. Time would tell.

Leonardo on the other hand, continued to stare with wide and amazed eyes.

 _“Whoa,”_ Splinter heard him whisper, staring at Donatello and Michelangelo both. And, at Splinter, with something besides caution for once.

Splinter smiled.

He wasn’t done teaching just yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in this AU, the b-team's dynamic is a fair amount different, obviously speaking. they're better trained for one thing, since they don't have to compete with their older brothers for biased attention from their father. and, since they never had a defacto leader or pushy second in command, they had to create their own duo fighting style. they're actually a lot better at fighting than the canonverse b-team, because they've been given the opportunity to really stretch their innate talents with martial arts. neither of them has a pesky hero complex either, so their ninjutsu is more so true to the way of ninja: to win, almost anything goes. (not to mention their teamwork is A++, since they've never had a rivalry to be the best.)
> 
> plus, as you've probably noticed, Splinter is a lot more attentive to their specific needs and personality traits in this universe. since he didn't have his 2.0 sons to raise and favor, (i've ranted before about how he basically played out his own childhood through Raph and Leo), he actually had to figure out how to better understand his rather eccentric sons, and mold his parenting and teaching styles to better suit them both. it'll make it a lot easier for him to help Raph and Leo in this universe too, since he's already adjusted to changing the rules to things depending on which son he's interacting with.
> 
> tbh OSOTD Splinter is the best dad out of all the 'verses i write at the moment, excluding my one alter-timeline The Age Swap Remix. good job Splinters, both of you.
> 
> also: if you wouldn't mind, [please consider buying me a Ko-fi ](https://ko-fi.com/A3022DE7) so i can keep busing to work and have time to write these fics for you all. rewards are included for those who do. :3


	10. screaming mimi

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> unprompted, but specifically bc i felt this april needed a moment to get her licks in.

With a vaguely successful mission complete, another Kraang lab destroyed, and April’s father _still_ missing, she got out of the Shellraiser with a sigh. Her body ached, and her mood was dropping pretty low. The lack of information or clues to where her dad was continuing to unsettle her; lodging a wedge of worry between her ribs.

It didn’t help that she’d had to deal with being in a close-quarters space with Raph and Leo all night; the two feral mutants side eyeing her still, even with the weeks now adding up to a month since they moved into the lair. Their distaste for her presence was pretty clear, from the way they pushed, and shoved, and tended to literally snap at her if they interacted.

It annoyed April more than it scared her anymore, mostly because she felt that the two brothers were looking down on her. Why, she couldn’t really tell. Probably just their biasedness towards humans persisting, despite how much effort she was putting into remaining civil, even in the face of their bad tempers.

Of course, that didn’t mean her own temper didn’t spike, every time one of them got in her personal space and tried to intimidate her. Like right then, as Raph shoved April from behind. Apparently, she wasn’t moving fast enough.

April shot him a displeased look, which Raph just curled his lip at. He started to shove past her, putting his hand on her shoulder and pushing her roughly to the side. And, because this was the fifth time in the last half hour that one of the feral brothers was trying something like this, April felt something _snap_ inside her.

She’d been nice. She’d been kind. She’d been sensitive to their situation and she’d been polite _every single time_ Leo or Raph tried to aggress her.

She was _done_ letting them push her around. Feral raised or not, her space was her _own,_ and she didn’t have to take orders from someone who was just throwing his weight around.

She slapped his hand away, and rounded on Raph; who stared at her with a challenge in his expression. He didn’t expect her to fight back, he expected her to duck her head and let him keep on pushing her around. April could see it in his eyes and she could read it all through his posture.

“I am running on _four hours_ of sleep, _one meal_ in the last twelve hours,” April said slowly, tight and angry. “and I have just had to lie to my aunt for the _hundredth time_ about you guys. I am tired, I am stressed, I _just want to go get food,_ and I _do not_ have patience for this, Raph. So this is me, asking nicely, for you to _back off.”_

A slow surprise entered his expression, and Raph’s shoulders hunched.

He growled, low and threatening, and took a step further into April’s space; baring his teeth and still acting like an enormous dickhead.

April bared her own teeth, and snapped back, “I said, _back! OFF!”_

Raph made a rattling sound, the growl morphing into a drawn out screech. He opened his hands and raised his claws, clear threat.

April put herself right into his space, and screamed in his face.

Raph reeled, eyes going wide for a moment, and then he returned the scream with a deeper, bone-thrumming howl.

April summoned every ounce of stored up frustration, anger, and _fury-_ and let it out in one sound.

The scream echoed off the subway tunnel around them, doubling back and making even April’s ears ring. Raph took a step backwards, his howl cutting off. April kept pushing forwards, temper blazing and screaming without restraint.

Raph backed up as far as he could, right into a startled Leo, who’d frozen as he’d come out of the Shellraiser. The two ferals gave her alarmed looks, and April kept screaming at them until her voice gave out.

She panted for a moment, glaring at the still startled mutants, and then said, “You want this whole thing to work? Then chill the _hell out_ with the intimidation, okay?” She swallowed dryly, reining in her temper. “I’m not going to be nice to you if you can’t be nice to me, got it?”

Raph and Leo exchanged glances, muttering something in clicks.

April snarled. _“Got it?”_

That got jerky nodding in response.

“Good,” April said, putting her hands on her hips. “Then this might stop being an enormous pain in my ass every night.”

She turned her back on the two brothers, only to come face to face with the opposite pair. April realized she’d just screamed Donnie and Mikey’s brothers into submission, right in front of them.

Her cheeks warmed. “Um. Sorry. I’m having an off night.”

“… _dude,”_ Mikey said reverently. “That was fuckin’ _sick,_ girl.” He clapped his hands, grinning brightly. “I didn’t think you had it in you!”

April grimaced a little. Had she been coming off _that_ wimpy?

“What he means is,” Donnie corrected, shooting Mikey a glance. “we weren’t sure if you’d ever knock them down a notch like you should, and actually get away with it.” He glanced behind April. “I hope you two learned your lesson.”

 _“Fuck off!”_ Raph said, and April could hear embarrassment in those words. She tried to not laugh, and largely failed. Mostly because the absurdity of what she’d just done was catching up with her- she’d _screamed_ someone into submission, for god’s sake- and what even was her life?

( _Why do none no one act right?_ Raph whispered in a frustrated series of clicks, watching _Aprill_ walk away with his brothers. _Human small-fragile-weak, but not acting so? What??_

Leo shook his head. _Don’t know don’t understand, Aprill too much like Mykey small but not acting small? Confusing very confusing_

 _…maybe is why Dawnie keeping her here letting her stay?_ Raph suggested.

_Maybe?? Still small-weak though_

They both hummed to themselves, still puzzled why _Dawnie_ would let a small and noisy human hang around their territory.

 _Confusing,_ Raph said finally, sore about being startled into backing down by a _human_ of all things.

Leo nodded sympathetically. _Very confusing_ )

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> they sort themselves out eventually; april just needed to really start standing up for herself, and the boys needed to be knocked down a few pegs with their behavior towards her. they're all best buds later on, once everyone has an easier time communicating.
> 
> also, [please consider buying me a Ko-fi ](https://ko-fi.com/A3022DE7). i'd really appreciate it. :0


	11. sleeping too little, sleeping not enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i doubt anyone requested this but i wrote it while i had no internet connection and thus couldn't check.
> 
> uhhhhhhh anyways here's some farmhouse feels, bc that arc was jam packed with hurt/comfort opportunities.

Raph was only partially awake, faintly aware of his family and their movements, when he heard light but heavy footsteps come in through the back door. Too light to be his brothers’, too heavy to be April’s or smaller Jones’. And they didn’t move like turtle or ninja or small juvenile anyways.

Casey. Casey was home.

Raph sighed under his breath, a little more at ease as another member of his family returned. It was better when they were all here, all together where he could see and hear and protect them. It wasn’t _necessary_ for Casey to go out like he did; Donnie had taken care of the bills, as abstract that concept remained to Raph. Money was not an issue, though Raph didn’t quite get why it would be in the first place.

And yet Casey still left, and came back, and then left again. Day in and day out, finding places to work and make money, and come back afterwards smelling like humans and sweat and exhaustion.

Raph would have preferred Casey stayed put, where he could be watched and bothered and roughhoused with. It would be safer if they all stayed _together,_ because they’d already lost… too much.

Being apart let people get hurt.

“Anyone here? Hello?” Casey was asking, coming through the house and bringing with him human world scents. Raph wrinkled his snout; Casey smelt like misery, today. Barely hidden feelings and upset worrying. It was a bitter scent, unpleasant to breathe in.

 _Here,_ Raph signaled gruffly, not bothering with human words. It was enough anyways, since Casey appeared and came to stand in the room with the _teevee_ in it. Raph slid one lazy eye towards the human, not willing to budge out of his spot at the foot of the couch.

“Where’s everyone else?” Casey asked, hands in his pockets and slouching not languidly, but tiredly. “They go out already?”

Yes some had gone out, even though Raph still wished they’d all stay _put._

“Walking,” He explained, counting off the people who’d gone. “April, your ssister, left ‘round-” time was hard to think of in numbers. “-past midday? Later on, but not too late.”

Casey hummed. “Hope they’re back for dinner. Where’s Donnie and Leo?”

“Leo’s upstairs,” Raph said, knowing that with certainty. He could feel Leo that direction. “Donnie is ssleeping. So quiet, okay?”

“Not anymore,” Donnie interrupted in a gravelly voice, passing the _teevee_ room as he went to the kitchen. He waved vaguely at them as he did, and Raph frowned hard. Donnie did the same things Casey and April did; finding too many things to be concerned about and not resting, or eating, or staying _put_ like they should. Raph had been pleased Donnie was actually sleeping, for once, but now he wasn’t and it was Casey’s fault.

Raph growled under his breath at Casey, clicking _Stupid you_ without really meaning it. Casey just yawned, and kicked off his heavy boots. Stepping onto the mattress Raph or whoever’s turn it was that night slept on, which sat in front of the couch and was much comfier and better for sprawling on. Raph watched his human friend-companion move like it hurt to do so, Casey slumping onto the couch with a gust of breath and groaning loudly.

Raph saw again the dark rings under Casey’s eyes, and the way he’d let his shaggy hair become carelessly tangled. Every part of him said _tired_ and _worry_ and _hidden-sad_ , and Raph nearly sighed. Smaller Jones wasn’t here to boss Casey into smiling or eating, and April wasn’t here to remind Casey with clever words to actually sleep. And Donnie was no help, since he didn’t do those things himself anymore.

Raph decided that even if he couldn’t pay bills, or watch-protect his entire family all the time, or fix the gaping _wrongness_ that had settled in his and Leo’s and Donnie’s chests the past months- he could fix this, just a little.

Casey was strong- for a stupid human- and fought well when he had his sticks and pucks and captured-lightning glove. However, since Casey was tired and distracted, it was very easy for Raph to grab his leg and pull him off the couch with one tug.

Casey made upset-surprised noises, flailing, but he was tired and hurting and couldn’t righten himself before Raph pulled him into a hug. Casey didn’t flail anymore after that, sitting confused as Raph held him to his chest.

“Raph, dude. What the fuck.”

 _Shhhh, silence sitting be quiet and sleeping stupid you,_ Raph said sternly. He waited for Casey to arrange himself into the piles of pillows and blankets Raph had been comfortable in. When Casey did not, Raph pulled together human words to say, “ _Ssleeping,_ now. You can do other things later. Resting, no- no more working or bills. _Rest.”_

“Uh,” Casey said.

Raph put his hand up to Casey’s tangled hair, picking his claws at the knots there. He tugged off Casey’s headwrap thing and tossed it out of the way; starting to force the unruly hair into smoother order. April and smaller Jones took care of theirs with brushes- Casey should do that more often, like them.

Raph hadn’t been apart from Leo or Donnie for long- or April and smaller Jones- but still. He’d been lonely, sitting and guarding lazily all alone. Casey was warm like his other human friend-companions, and even if he wasn’t settling down like he should’ve, like April knew to and smaller Jones was learning to, it was good to be close and curled up and carefully tugging knots out of black hair. Raph had had just Leo, once, for scratching and washing and being near. Now Raph had many family members, and knew better what loneliness felt like without them close.

He used to hate Casey, the way he barged into his kin’s territory and threatened them and tried to take April away. Now he was important. Important to Raph, important to April, important to everyone else- even Donnie, who sniped and snapped at Casey and hid how much he liked having another friend-companion. Casey was _theirs,_ even if the others seemed to not get that yet.

Casey used to make Raph snap and snarl, too, but now grooming his friend-companion made a tiny purr rumble in his chest and thaw some of its painful cold.

“What is even happening right now,” Casey said in a still confused voice. But he wasn’t trying to get away so Raph didn’t see anything wrong with confusion. He kept purring and sorting out Casey’s hair; replacing the harsh human world scents with comforting _kin-family-home_ ones, the longer Casey lay on the bed with him.

“You’re being aggressively cared for,” Donnie drawled, leaning over the couch and making a mocking face at Casey.

 _“_ I’m _what?”_

“Leo does it too, sometimes. You get used to it,” Donnie sipped at the sharply bitter smelling mug in his hands; watching Raph and Casey both. “It’s… not actually really all that bad, and they won’t let you leave until they’re done anyways. So. Just go with it, Jones.”

“I. That’s.” Casey said in starts and stops. Raph clicked _holding still_ at him as he wriggled a bit, tugging on a knot and reminding Casey he should not be trying to leave. Casey remained tense and confused for another moment, and then slumped against Raph’s chest.

“You know what? Okay.” He said, and stopped making a fuss about being taken care of. “I’m tired as fuck anyways.”

“So _sleeping,”_ Raph reminded, because once the knots were gone that’s what Casey would be doing. Right where Raph could watch him and make sure of it.

“Yeah, sure, just wake me up for dinner, ‘kay?”

Food was important for resting too, so Raph would allow that. Now if he could also get Donnie to also sit and sleep and be still for more than a few moments…

Raph didn’t have to catch Donnie unawares- which was hard, but doable if you really tried and were patient- since Raph’s _tall-smart-stubborn_ brother decided the bed was a good place to be all by himself. Raph purred approval, and finished fixing Casey’s hair.

Soon enough, Casey was lying on his side and snoring underneath blankets. Hair smooth and headwrap disallowed from returning until sleeping was complete. Raph would sit and make _sure_ it was complete, because even if he couldn’t talk to Casey like April or smaller Jones or Donnie did, having long winding conversations about worries and thoughts with words that sometimes just wouldn’t _work_ for Raph- he could at least do this. Keep watch and make sure some of the exhaustion induced misery would go away from Casey.

But, with that task mostly complete, Raph was left again with nothing to really do. The hollow in his chest widened again, and he sighed into his curled up knees. If Casey weren’t so tired, Raph would have woken him for a play fight. Anything to distract himself from the _missing_ feeling. Raph keened quietly in his throat at that feeling, frustrated by its return and his inability to banish it.

Then a hand on his head distracted Raph from it, as well as the gentle scratch of nails down his neck.

“I don’t know why he does it,” Donnie said very, very quietly. He absently scratched at Raph’s skull, seeming lost in thought and mostly looking at Casey. “He doesn’t _need_ to work. We have plenty of money.”

Raph hummed, sliding closer to Donnie for better scratching. His brother did so, and as Raph enjoyed the sensation, he thought about Donnie’s question.

“You do it too,” Raph said eventually, sorting together what he’d observed from his brother and April and Casey. All three of them were very similar, sometimes, despite being completely opposite other times. “Thinking but avoiding thinking, by working. No ssleeping, or eating. Just working worrying.” He clicked _annoyance(s)_ _loved but annoyance(s)_ to himself, and caught a hint of a smile on Donnie’s face. Donnie hadn’t learned as much as Mikey had, of real turtle speaking, but it was often enough he caught bits of what Raph and Leo were saying.

It made it harder sometimes to make jokes or plan without Donnie knowing, but the times when Donnie would _answer_ in turtle were worth it. Very much so.

“You don’t really sleep much either,” Donnie pointed out. He took away his hand from Raph’s skull, and Raph immediately wanted it back and continuing to scratch. “I know you sit by Mikey all night, Raph. Every single night.”

Raph had thought he’d been sneaky. He had not been enough so.

“…can-not do much elsse,” Raph admitted, frustrated and upset about that fact. He couldn’t heal, except a little, couldn’t pay bills, couldn’t _understand_ bills, and could only bully his family into eating and sleeping sometimes. Watching-protecting was all he could do, as well as waiting.

Raph didn’t want to keep waiting. They’d waited long enough. When would Mikey finally _wake up?_

Donnie sighed, quiet but hard. “I know the feeling.”

Raph turned his head, looking at his brother. Donnie had lines in his expression and hints in his posture that spoke _misery_ so much louder than Casey’s had.

Raph loved Mikey, who was bright and small and confusing and so fierce, and hadn’t deserved what happened. But Mikey was, whether he and Donnie really recognized it, another part of Donnie’s _being._ A counterpart and complimenting opposite. It was wrong, the two of them being separated for so long, even if Mikey was just upstairs. There but _not._

Raph missed Mikey, a physical _missing_ cold and painful inside his chest. But he suspected that it was much worse for Donnie, who hadn’t been apart from Mikey even once their whole lives. He’d watched Donnie grow wane and cramped, tangled up in worries and thoughts none of them could draw him out of. All because Mikey wasn’t here to do that, to pull at the tangle and undo the knot Donnie was making in himself. Mikey knew Donnie best, like Donnie knew Mikey best, and that was just a fact.

Raph and Leo and their human friend-companions could try, but really, the only thing that would fix the pain and misery Donnie carried would be Mikey waking up.

They weren’t complete like this. Three pieces and missing their fourth. Missing their _cares-for-small-young_ and all their human and not-human friends, which hurt at first and still hurt now, but most importantly missing _Mikey._

Everything was wrong. And Raph couldn’t fix anything of it.

Except.

Watching. And protecting. And caring where he could.

Like shoving Donnie’s arm up and tucking them together; leaned against the couch and surrounded the pillows Casey hadn’t claimed. Donnie didn’t try to stop Raph, or even really protest. Smart, since Raph wouldn’t have let him get away anyways.

It was somewhat better, pressing close and having Donnie near and tangible. The cold _missing_ in Raph’s chest didn’t feel quite so present.

“Should sleep,” Raph instructed Donnie. The bitter drink- _coffee,_ he reminded himself- was gone from Donnie’s hands, which meant he couldn’t use it as an excuse to not rest.

“…I can’t,” Donnie replied. “I wasn’t before, and I doubt I can now. Sorry,” he added, sheepish. “There’s just- I have things to do. I can’t stop now.”

Raph growled, and slid his arms around Donnie to lock him in place. Like hell was Raph letting his brother off so easy.

Donnie’s arms wound around Raph in return, a few beats later, accompanied by a fond huff. Raph put his forehead against Donnie’s, pressing near and humming _here, you-me-us here._

“…I guess I can stay a little while. Just for a bit.”

Raph chattered, _yes sitting staying being close with me, resting taking-care is better not running circles exhausting self you you know this stupid Donnie but do not anyway, applies to you too too-tall-too-many-thoughts Donnie_

“Are you making fun of me?” Donnie asked.

“No,” Raph replied. He wasn’t. Mostly.

“I feel like you’re making fun of me. Or something close.”

 _Would never,_ Raph lied, and laughed as Donnie snorted disbelievingly.

Raph tried to shift closer, curl up better and possibly make Donnie lay down- but his brother glanced at Casey, and wouldn’t. When they had first started getting closer, Raph hadn’t understood Donnie’s often refusals of closeness. He’d learned better now, mostly because they had easier time communicating, that Donnie didn’t _like_ showing too much affection or closeness in front of others. Mostly in front of Splinter and their human friend-companions. Raph recognized it as _shyness_ now, and not disrespect or dislike.

But Casey was asleep, snoring and breathing even, so Donnie was being unnecessarily shy. Casey wouldn’t see because he was asleep. Raph understood that Donnie had to remain collected and strong in front of their friend-companions, because he was still leader even if he let them bully him sometimes, so Raph rarely overstepped the boundary Donnie had wanted in place. Respecting Donnie’s authority and the fact that he had to maintain a level of bravado in front of others.

But the boundary was not needed here and now. What was needed was closeness and resting. Raph told Donnie so, chastising and stern, and pointed out that their human friend-companion was very much asleep. Like Donnie should be.

Donnie vaguely protested, _“He might wake up,”_ but in the end relented.

With some shuffling and arranging, Raph got Donnie to lie down like he needed to. Propped up slightly by pillows, on his back and looking up at the ceiling. Raph lay beside him, putting his arms and head across Donnie’s midsection, partially to make sure Donnie stayed _put,_ and purring gently. He closed his eyes and put his head down on his arms, and purred a little louder as Donnie’s hand came to rest on Raph’s shell. Rubbing ridges and lines absently with his clever fingers.

Raph felt the tension bleed out of Donnie’s body, bit by bit, and trilled quietly, _resting yes comfort-safe-cared-for, safe here safe with me sleeping now brother-mine_

Donnie didn’t go to sleep, disappointingly, but did start to purr, nearly inaudibly. So close to his brother’s chest and voice, Raph felt the purr in his bones and purred louder in response. _Good yes,_ he hummed encouragingly, _closeness comfort you you are safe you resting now, will care for you will protect you love you love you_

 _…thank you,_ Donnie said, so very quietly. And even quieter, _love you_

It had warbles in it that should not be, but Donnie did _try_ to speak right when speaking turtle, and Raph understood perfectly. Donnie spoke little like this, very rarely and only when no one else was looking, so Raph listened close to not miss a thing.

Sometimes, Donnie would say things he wouldn’t say in human, speaking it instead in turtle. Like now, as he clicked _scared,_ with the slightest tremor, followed by _worry-fear for,_ and attached a _kin-family_ to that to explain why the fearful worry. And then a heart clenching _missing hurts hurtful-missing_ at the very end, saying _“Mikey,”_ as the addressment to who he was missing in the language he knew best.

Raph listened, hummed _sympathy sorry I’m here here for you shh comfort-care for you, missing too hurtful-missing but I’m here we’re here I’m here brother-loved-mine,_ and purred as comfortingly as possible. Donnie’s purr remained subdued, an undertone almost, but still responded with rising thrums when Raph asked for them. The sounds rang between them, a dull tone that was _comfort_ and _love_ and _protection-safe_ , filling up the painful gap they both had inside them.

It warmed the sharp cold in Raph’s chest, and made the cramped misery in Donnie relax. And despite Raph’s promise to remain vigilant, he found his senses growing hazy anyways. Lulled into sleepiness the longer they sang back and forth like they were. Raph had said he would be aware and awake, but Donnie had been right that he didn’t sleep at night, busy watching over Mikey, and having closeness to Donnie was too comfortable to resist half-napping.

Raph was only roused when Donnie did, his brother deciding it was time to get up again. Raph growled a refusal, but let Donnie slip away regardless.

“I’ll sleep later,” Donnie promised. A lie they both knew wouldn’t happen. “Keep Jones out of trouble until dinner, okay?”

Raph grumbled and growled and called Donnie stupid under his breath, but nodded. Donnie only smiled at the insults, and got up to leave.

 _Love you,_ Raph called after him, just as Donnie reached the doorway. Donnie stopped, and glanced back over his shoulder.

Donnie smiled, and said, _Love you_ , and then left.

Raph huffed, grumbled to himself about brothers who slept too much and brothers who didn’t sleep enough, and settled down to keep watch once again. It was less lonely than before, with the fading warmth of Donnie’s presence around him and in his chest, and with Casey’s breathing filling the silence of the room.

But the coldness inside Raph remained, and the oppressively missing presence above him did as well. Nothing would be right again until those one of those things left, and the other came back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so  
> -yes smaller jones is casey's little sister. minor spoilers for the main fic, we'll be seeing a fair amount of her later.  
> -yes mikey fought the shredder instead of leo this time.  
> -school has started again and my hours have been cut, so a [Ko-fi or two would be really appreciated.](https://ko-fi.com/A3022DE7)


	12. final mockery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> of course i would write the scene of mikey facing down the shredder. who do you take me for?

Mikey’s sides heaved, working through exertion and bruised agony. His feet and hands were distantly freezing, while the rest of him _burned_ like he’d never burned before.

Another set of weapons came down at him, and he yelled a cry of defiance as he tore through them. Foot soldiers, some metal and some flesh, tore right back at him. Gashes opened on his arms as he swung his nunchaku, unable to block every single attack that came at him.

Mikey broke a neck, an arm, a sword a pike a naginata- he threw three soldiers off and into the abyss of the pit beside them- five more took their place and he battled on.

Desperation thrummed in his chest, adrenaline and skull buzzing _fear_ mixing with it and turning him into something that couldn’t think past _defend_ and _attack._

He heard the Shredder’s laughter before the man was on him. Deep and mocking and something Mikey wanted to tangibly grab and cram back down Shredder’s throat. He barely had time to think of that image before razor blades entered his vision, and then there was only _pain._

Mikey screamed. He couldn’t help it, even with all his training and experience- the merciless slash across his plastron and chin blinded him to anything other than _pain pain pain painpainpain-_

His footing slipped.

Another slash downwards.

He caught it with his taut chains, and Mikey felt his leg slip sideways on the boardwalk as slush and ice worked against him.

“ _You can never defeat me,”_ Shredder said, and shoved Mikey backwards, right off the edge-

Mikey fell.

He turned it into a controlled fall, landing heavy and getting up anyways. He ran, retreating to better ground, and found himself cornered again by the foot soldiers that’d been plaguing him before.

He usually would’ve quipped at them, made a joke or two. There wasn’t any room for that anymore; his thoughts had narrowed to only _surviving_ , and the ever present knowledge that if he fell here Shredder would go for his family and Mikey _refused._ He refused to die here and let Shredder anywhere _near_ his family.

Mikey snarled, and tore the head off of a robot. He swung his chains, switching to kusarigama without even thinking of the action, and slashed open the face of another. This one bled. He barely took in the scream of agony. Mikey just moved onto the next target.

Punch kick block defend shove slash block tackle _stab-_

Mikey felt a murderous presence behind him, whirling to catch the blades of Shredder again. The masked man bore down on him without relent; slashing again and again and getting closer to a serious hit each time. Mikey’s chin and plastron throbbed, red seeping and oozing as they fought.

He lost all his air, Shredder’s foot kicking him from the boardwalk again. This time, he nearly couldn’t react before it was too late; barely catching his fingers on a boardwalk and swinging down to race along the one below. Ash and snow clogged his airways; cold and clouded air doing nothing to stop the burning of his sides and lungs.

Mikey was scared. Mikey was terrified.

Mikey was _furious._

The Shredder- he’d hurt Mikey’s family again and again- nearly killing them all _so many times-_

Mikey dispatched Foot soldiers on automatic. He felt one of his chains be broken and snatched up the end with a blade. His fury and determination to _protect his family_ rose in his throat, choking him as he defended with a broken weapon.

He vaguely heard Shredder saying something, tone harsh and hateful, and Mikey barely heard it. Everything was underwater and he couldn’t breathe right anymore.

Shredder appeared like a bolt of lightning, and then Mikey was falling- red lines splitting across his arm and trailing droplets as he fell.

Mikey landed, rolled, and found himself breathlessly staring at the ash clouded sky. Sickly thickly grey and filling with the black smoke of burning buildings in the distance. The world was ending and Mikey was all alone on the ground of a cold construction site. Mikey was going to die.

He was going to die.

He was going to _die._

Hysterically, laughter bubbled out of Mikey’s throat.

He was going to die and he’d never see his family again.

This was it.

Mikey laughed harder.

He heard Shredder land on the ground nearby, and he rolled over. Mikey stared at the red coming from him, blood staining the ground underneath him as he struggled to get off it. And he laughed.

 _“…you would laugh in the face of your death?”_ Shredder asked, and Mikey laughed at that too.

Mikey got off the ground, breathless and aching and bleeding and _laughing._

_“Stop it.”_

Mikey smiled and bared his teeth and laughed harder. It swelled against the walls of the pit and felt loud enough he could feel it echoing back at him.

_“STOP IT!”_

Mikey clutched his sides, head swimming with the fact that he was going to die and the increasing blood loss. He felt something coil and snarl in his chest, burning hotter than his lungs and pain. It rose up in his throat and made the laughter edged with fury and hate.

Shredder stared at him, horrified and equally as hateful.

He raised his weapons, and charged. Mikey, laughing and unable to stop, charged with his remaining nunchuck and broken kusarigama blade.

He lost track of what was happening. All Mikey could do was attack and defend and attack and defend and _try to tear Shredder to pieces._

He was still laughing. Everything hurt and he was going to die and he was going to do while laughing in Shredder’s fucking face.

Mikey got knocked backwards, skidding on the snow and ash. His weapons broken and tossed away, leaving him defenseless. Shredder raised himself up, growing huge and monstrous in Mikey’s eyes, and- and-

The thing in his chest burned bright, and snapped cleanly. Snarling louder than the throbbing pain in Mikey’s body. Snarling so loud it _came right out of him._

Mikey stopped laughing, and _screamed._

It felt like fire, and light, and fury and a hundred burning emotions. His throat ached and his skull pounded and Mikey screamed in a way that made Shredder stumble backwards. In _fear._

Like Leo and Raph could do. Like Mikey had been trying to imitate for months. The victory of the act flooded through Mikey, and he let everything go to embrace it. He felt the shift, the cool slide of primal instinct over taught skills, and fell into without fear.

Mikey snarled, screaming and laughing and screaming with laughter, and snatched a fallen Foot weapon from the snowy ground. A blade, short and sharp.

Mikey ran, body moving without plan or thought, just the need to _rend_ and _attack_ driving his path.

He lost thought. He lost words.

All that remained was the intent to _kill._

Cuts opened on his arms, his legs- one so close to his eye the blood splatter blinded him- fists landed and kicks followed, harsh and bone shuddering. Mikey kept fighting. That was all he could do, just keep _fighting_ until he couldn’t anymore.

He misjudged a slash with his stolen sword, and paid for it with a kick to the side. Mikey lost contact with the ground, and flew far enough that he landed with a _crack_ on newly set cement. His shell rang with agony, and he spat blood on the cold stone. He felt himself shaking, all over. His chest trembling, alight and burning.

He was still laughing. The trembling was from how breathlessly he was laughing.

“ _You’re no better than those brothers of yours,”_ Shredder spat at him, advancing. “ _You’re just like them. Just like Hamato Yoshi. A pathetic little_ monster.”

Mikey reared up, baring his teeth and gums in a furious grin. “ _Great!”_ He exclaimed madly, hysterical last words escaping him. “ _I always wanted to be just like my big brothers and old man!”_

He broke down into laughter again, and howled as he took one final shot at killing Shredder.

He didn’t stand a chance.

When it was nearly over, and he lay sprawled on the ground once again, Mikey looked up at the blackened midday sky with a single working eye and _laughed_. He bared his teeth in a smiling snarl at the man that was going to kill him and then his family, and laughed in his face.

Black hatred coursed through Mikey as Shredder stood over him, glaring down at Mikey as he bled from the slashes all over him.

His consciousness was seeping away, with each agonizing inhale that stretched his split plastron. He couldn’t see out of his right eye, the world gone dark in that socket. His shattered knee throbbed harsher than any of his other injuries, brilliant blinding pain unending. It made him want to die and Mikey felt himself closing in on that point.

Mikey kept smiling, stretching wounds on his face and not caring. A few chuckles made it out of him, barely, as his breathing stuttered.

His world was going dark on the edges, and he revelled in the anger he was still causing in Shredder. He hadn’t given up, he hadn’t stopped laughing. Mikey would have taken Shredder down with him, but this… this was all he could do.

He hoped his brothers would get away. He hoped they’d find a way out of the city and away from the rampant death filling it.

He wished he could go with them.

He wished he’d gotten to say goodbye.

He wished he could tear Shredder’s throat out with his _bare hands._

Mikey laughed defiantly, and didn’t flinch away as a fist came down on his skull.

Black took over.

He didn’t care. It was a relief.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ........i'm not sorry.
> 
> (pls reward my angst with a [Ko-fi](https://ko-fi.com/A3022DE7). it'll make more of it appear!)


	13. clash.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i WAS working on the answer drabble to someone's question about what happened with the feral brothers + Mikey's cat, buuuuuut then i remembered the mindworm incident existed and i couldn't help myself.

Leo sheathed his short sword, bowing low and returning to all fours like he knew best. He heard Mikey and Donnie say to do otherwise, to be careful, but Leo couldn’t listen to them. His eyes were pinned to Raph, who was standing in a way that said _hate,_ and _fury,_ and _fight me._

 _Raph,_ Leo asked, taking careful steps across the floor of their enemy’s nest. _Raph answer me, it’s us it’s kin-family-beloved-ones…_

Raph’s blank white eyelids didn’t open, staying shut and hostile. He growled, removing his weapons from his belt and advancing forwards. The Shredder, the man that smelt of death and hatred and monstrous things, loomed behind Leo’s brother like a living nightmare.

Raph walked on two legs, steps deliberate and heavy. Nothing like the light and clever ones he usually took. He stopped, a small distance from Leo- staring at Leo like he didn’t know who Leo, or their brothers behind him, even were.

Leo’s heart clenched, and he tried to find the connection he and all his brothers shared. The link between them that kept them intertwined even when they’d been separate and strangers to one another. Leo crooned _love,_ and _please,_ and _brother-mine Raph-beloved look at me see me I am here you me us belonging together… Donnie-Mikey-Leo-Raph right yes brothers-together… kin-family-loved-ones…_

Raph’s end of their connection remained cold, _dead_ feeling, and did not reach back. He did not return the sounds of _love_ or _family_ or _brother-mine._ Raph stared at Leo as an _enemy_ , and curled his lip as he sank into a two-leg fighting stance.

Leo’s chest trembled. He felt- lost. Wrong. He felt empty in a part of his center that had never been such and he couldn’t reconcile feeling so. The feeling from earlier- of having something _ripped out of him_ and _stolen_ \- ached in a sharp spike, clawing at Leo’s heart.

 _Raph,_ Leo pleaded, eyes filling as his brother remained angry and hateful. _Please, see me hear me, I came I came for you Donnie Mikey me we came for you, you are_ saved-

“Kill him,” The monster in human skin said, and Raph bared his teeth in a snarling smile.

Leo couldn’t move, feeling the emptiness inside him swell and swallow him, as his brother charged forwards with weapons aimed to kill. Claw and Rockwell followed; the same aura of hatred and fury replacing the cat and ape’s usually kind and warm personalities. Leo barely noticed them, stuck staring up as Raph bore down on him.

Had this been how Raph felt, the time when Leo lost himself in sickness?

Chains wrapped around Leo, yanking him off his feet and backwards. Donnie appeared to block Raph, yelling at Leo and Raph both, while Mikey caught Leo.

Leo keened, terrified and off-balance. He tried to find words in English to express himself, explain the raw gripping pain tearing him apart inside as Raph and Donnie fought for _real_ and not just playful challenging- but one look at Mikey’s grim, utterly furious expression showed he didn’t need to.

Mikey’s eyes were swimming with anger and unshed tears, and Leo knew his brother understood perfectly.

Claw yowled at them both, leaping past Raph and Donnie’s fighting- her claw-blades only stopped from raking them to pieces by Leatherhead, who plowed into his friend-companion to protect them both. Leo watched as his family members try to tear one another to pieces, unable to comprehend _how_ they could do this to each other.

He clawed at his chest, keening again and unable to produce anything other than a long note of _anguish._

“Don’t worry,” Mikey said, low and growling as his chest rumbled with a furious noise. His eyes, both the milky dead one and the brightly hateful one, were fixed on Shredder. “I’ll _kill him,”_ He said, lips curled in a snarl that pulled his facial scars into a mask of livid emotion.

He let go of Leo then, weapons whirling as he charged into the fray, and Leo was left alone to stare at the horrific sight before him.

This was wrong. This was a violation of everything they’d come to be. This- this was something unspeakably horrible, having kin and companion fight to kill one another. He knew there were things forcing his family to do so, but still he could not comprehend it.

It was too foreign. Too wrong. It made bile rise in Leo’s throat and a shuddering feeling run through him- created by fear and lack of understanding, which threatened to overwhelm him completely.

Leo closed his eyes for a brief moment, breathing in and taking control of his whirling emotions.

When he opened his eyes again, he stood up off the ground; unsheathing his sword and pushing aside the rising swell of grief and pain inside him.

Raph snarled something angry and mocking in Donnie’s face, knocking their tall brother backwards- while Mikey slipped between the Mutanimals’ fighting to take a go at Shredder. They needed Leo, all of them.

It was the four of them, together and entwined, no matter what may try to tear them apart. That was a fact of their lives, and Leo held onto it desperately.

Leo breathed in, and out, and leapt forwards to follow Mikey’s path. Following the burning bright warmth that sang from Mikey’s portion of their link, like Donnie’s still did as well, and using it to bury the achingly dead one leading to Raph.

Leo heard Casey and April charge into the fight as well, arriving late after dispatching and holding off sentries- the sound propelling Leo forwards with the knowledge that he and his brothers had backup that loved them as fiercely as Leo and his brothers loved the humans.

Tigerclaw and the mutants that followed him blocked Mikey’s path, and Leo cried out a howl as he threw himself into the battle. It startled their enemies backwards enough for him to enter the fight, and he and Mikey fell into step with one another as they advanced.

Leo’s chest rang with _missing_ agony, as well as rising fury, and he joined his brother in an effort to vanquish and satisfy both those things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Claw is formerly Klunk, now a very scary and amazing cat mutant who still dots on Mikey and the boys. she's Spike/Slash's replacement in this AU, and i'm pleased to have her exist.
> 
> maybe i'll do fallout stuff for this chapter later, if people want it.


	14. off limits!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i got around to finishing that much requested drabble about just what happened when Leo and Raph tried to attack Klunk.

One of the first things Leo noticed, after sorting out the individual scents of _Dawnie, Mykey,_ and _rat-that-is-big,_ along with hints of the human they kept around- was that there was an underlying scent of a small creature.

He’d been too exhausted and terrified the night before- reeling from smoke and fighting and human attackers- to notice the scent. But it was everywhere in the _layerr,_ on the walls and floors and coming strongest from _Mykey’s_ room…

Leo padded out of his and Raph’s designated room, chirping interestedly to himself. He hadn’t been able to eat anything last night, and he was starving now, coming out of the grief and shock from losing their nest. A meal would be appreciated.

 _Raph,_ Leo clicked, glancing back over his shoulder. Raph grumbled and turned over in their new bed. Leo clicked louder. _Raph! Small-fast-four-legs here here come see-smell_

 _No,_ Raph hissed, burying under his share of bed things. _Sleeping still stupid Leo_

 _No no sleeping you me us running hunting chasing!_ Leo insisted, tail shaking with excitement. This would be good, a bright spot in a lot of terrible things that were still trying to make his insides twist and hurt. Feeding would fix some of that.

Raph kept not moving, and Leo’s tail slowed its excited circling. He frowned at his stubborn brother and gave a narrowed eyed look.

 _Raph Raph Raph get up!_ Leo demanded. Raph kept on being stubborn and stupid and stayed in bed, and Leo sighed loudly. After another moment of _very_ patient waiting, he turned around, bowing close to the stone ground and grinning wickedly.

Raph shrieked angrily as Leo pounced on him, yelling _no no no sleeping not playing stupid Leo! Go away go away!_

 _Up up up get up!_ Leo trilled, wrestling with Raph. His brother yowled, biting and snapping as Leo did the same to him. The two of them rolled around, kicking and shoving their carefully made bed into disarray as they play-fought. Leo’s chest vibrated with happy hums, warbling growls escaping as he tackled Raph to nip at his brother’s arms and neck. He minded the old scar from that terrible horrible year they didn’t talk about, avoiding it as he bit at Raph’s scales and growled playfully.

 _FINE_ , Raph relented eventually, throwing Leo off to the side. Leo rolled, laughing as Raph grumpily shook himself of the fabrics. _Stupid stupid stupid falls-down Leo annoying, no sleeping just chasing yes yes,_ he trilled falsely, giving Leo a not-real glare. Leo crowed and preened, proud he’d made Raph get out of bed.

Leo shoved Raph outside; pushing his brother towards the most recent scent trail and making Raph admit there was food to be hunted here. Their brothers were so careless, letting a small furry thing infest their home and no doubt steal valuable food from them. Or maybe they just didn’t know better to not let little hissing-biting furry things into their homes, because neither _Mykey_ or _Dawnie_ seemed to know how to act like actual turtles.

Lucky for them Leo and Raph were here now, to show them correctly and take care of pests that were deliciously edible.

 _Mykey’s_ door was open, where the trail led to and from, and Leo caught no scent of his brother being inside it. He disregarded the open entry, following the trail elsewhere as Raph followed reluctantly. They crept to the end of the sleeping tunnel, where the _layerr_ became wide and cavernous. No one else was in sight, and Leo was relieved especially to not see _rat-that-is-big_.

Leo held himself close to the stone ground, scenting intently. Raph sat beside him and yawned lazily, being very unhelpful. Leo told his brother as such, and Raph rolled his eyes in disregard.

 _Come on come on come on,_ Leo urged Raph, trilling _excitement_ and _happiness_. This could be at least a little fun if they wanted it to be, and Leo really wanted something fun after all the horrible things the night before.

 _Tired,_ Raph complained.

 _Sleep later eat now!_ Leo countered.

 _Uuuuuuugh,_ was all Raph said in response. But he didn’t wander away to go back to sleep, so Leo pushed onwards with their hunt.

The trail led them out into the open, towards where the ground dipped down in sharp angles. It was covered around the edges by soft fabric, no doubt with feathers or spongey stuff inside. Leo sneakily approached it, smelling the scent grow stronger. And, as he spotted their prey, he barely contained the excited chirruping that wanted to come out of his throat.

A small creature with claws and itty-bitty fangs was curled up on the soft fabric, on the far side of the pit. It had not seen them coming, and wasn’t flicking its tail or ears in pretend-sleeping readiness to run. It wasn’t very big, but it would be enough to satisfy Leo and Raph’s hunger until they found more food.

Leo growled very, very quietly to Raph, _see see food yes? Feeding hunting time go go go_

 _Going going,_ Raph muttered, though with less reluctance than he’d had before. Leo knew Raph was hungry, but too sad-lazy to go find any while he’d been stubbornly sleeping. The sight of a meal was probably waking Raph up all the way, making him as eager for a chase and kill as Leo was.

They circled the pit, creeping around it from opposite directions. The itty-bitty _small-four-legged_ - _creature_ that would bite and claw lots if startled remained sleeping, not even flicking an ear as they approached. Leo shut his white eyelids, curling back his lips in anticipation for the pouncing and then killing.

But- just as Leo was crouching down to lead the first strike- the little creature opened its eyes and raised its head. Staring right at Leo with very aware awakeness.

Leo froze. He hadn’t even noticed the little meal waking up, let alone that it was aware of him and Raph! He waited for it to bolt away, scared by much bigger predators than itself- but it didn’t run at all. The little fuzzy creature yawned very wide, and got up very slowly to stre-e-e-e-etch itself languidly.

It then sat back down where it had been sleeping, and looked back and forth between Leo and Raph expectantly, its tail swishing lazily against the fabrics. It didn’t look like it was going to run, and it didn’t look like it was going to attack. It didn’t seem worried at all!

Leo decided this was an extremely stupid little creature, and that the kill was going to be much easier than he’d thought. Raph seemed to decide the same thing, starting to move closer again. Leo did the same, approaching the fuzzy meal carefully- seeing if _now_ it would startle and try to run away.

The itty-bitty meal didn’t run away at all, or even widen its eyes as Leo and Raph loomed over it. It just _mrrrowed_ at them, and started purring.

 _Stupid little four-legged fuzzy,_ Raph said, staring at it with his head tilted sideways.

 _Very very stupid,_ Leo agreed.

Their meal _mrrowed_ again, flicking an ear.

Leo decided they’d observed it being stupid long enough, and struck.

 _That_ got it to react as it should- their prey yowling angrily as Leo clipped its side with his claws. He didn’t draw blood, just knocking the little creature off the fabrics and onto the floor. It scrambled to its paws, puffed up and hissing. Raph leapt down at it, Leo following swiftly, and they gave chase with gleeful snarls. The little creature shrieked and ran, darting across the floor in an orange blur.

It ran up the other side of the pit, ripping its claws at the fabric to do so, and Leo and Raph caught up immediately. It was fast and agile- but they were also fast and agile and _smart._ They surrounded it, cutting off its escape routes, and tried slashing at it again. Their prey shrieked again, nimbly avoided with surprising ability, and retreated the way they’d come.

Leo chased after it, grinning wide and hungry. This was great; this was a rush of happy feelings that washed away his worries as he played a catch-and-kill game with his brother.

They nearly caught up with their prey a second time, Raph grinning the same hungry grin Leo was- their claws and teeth on the heels of the little fuzzy creature- when something wrapped around them both and yanked them backwards without warning.

Leo shrieked in surprise and offense as he was captured, tied up with Raph in cold metal as they hit the stone ground hard- but bit down on his cries as someone landed heavily right beside their heads.

 _Mykey_ stared down at them, his usually playful and silly demeanor replaced with a cold, unfaltering anger. He held them in place with his weapon, using the flexible metal links to pull them upwards enough so that he could talk right to their faces. Leo was too stunned to even struggle.

(“Okay, I know you two have trouble understanding our rules sometimes, but let’s make one thing clear,” Mikey said, eyes narrow and a shaking anger in his plastron. He’d cut his brothers some slack about anything else- but _not about his cat._ “You listening?”)

 _Mykey_ was saying something, and it took a moment for Leo to translate that he was asking for them to listen. The flat glare he had in place as he said that was so strange it had Leo nodding without a second thought- and Raph as well.

(“Good,” Mikey said. He leaned closer, kneeling on their level and speaking in a low, serious voice. “You chase my cat, you try to hurt my cat, you so much as touch a _hair on her head_ in a way that makes her upset- I’ll teach you both this lesson again, and this time I’ll dislocate your fingers to do it. _Capiche?”_

He waited a moment to see if his brothers understood any of that, and when Mikey got no confirmation, he tried again. “That cat? She’s _mine._ You get that, right? Klunk is _mine,_ and if you hurt her I’ll. Hurt. _You.”_ )

Small fuzzy creature was _Mykey’s_. Off limits. Leo nodded, getting the gist from _Mykey’s_ near growl alone. No more chasing or hunting the four-legged meal anymore. Raph nodded as well, and they waited to see if they’d get further punished for infringing on a rule of _Mykey_ and _Dawnie’s_ territory so soon after moving in.

(“Oh good! You two do get it!” Mikey released the kusarigama from its stranglehold around his brothers, letting them drop back onto the floor. He smiled, storing away his weapons in his belt. “Glad we could have this talk. I’mma just make sure my baby is a-okay, and then I’ll whip up you guys some breakfast, alright?”

Leo and Raph just blinked at him, and Mikey twinged a little inside. He was maybe being a bit too harsh on them, seeing as they’d just lost _everything_ of their home, but he just couldn’t let someone hurting his cat slide.

He’d apologize with some pancakes.)

 _Mykey_ patted Leo on the head, laughing and saying something Leo couldn’t understand. He patted Raph on the head as well, and then pushed past them to go for the itty-bitty creature he’d claimed as his own. Said creature _mrowed_ loudly at _Mykey_ as he picked it up, complaining very clearly to Leo’s sibling as it rubbed itself against _Mykey’s_ cheeks.

 _Why caring for food?_ Leo asked in confusion, watching their brother fuss over the creature.

… _could be_ _kin-family? Friend-companion?_ Raph suggested, equally as confused.

 _But- small and edible! Prey!_ Leo said. It made no sense at all to not eat the yowly little thing.

 _Not to Mykey,_ Raph pointed out, and Leo clicked _confused-annoyed_ as _Mykey_ kept cooing at the little creature he’d called _Klunk._

Leo realized, as _Mykey_ started walking away with his purring, smug little ball of fuzz- that Leo and Raph had submitted to a much smaller opponent with scarcely a thought. And over a tiny fuzzy _meal_.

Leo put his head between his hands, and trilled _confused confused so confused Mykey is small should act small but seem big-scary-dangerous? How why what?? Wrong two-leg-walking turtle nonsense!_

Raph frowned, tilted his head one way and then the other as he thought, and settled on responding with _too tired don’t care, going back to sleeping now,_ and got up and left.

Leo groaned and whined and chattered angrily after Raph’s retreat. Mostly because Raph was avoiding examining the weird and confusing things happening to them _yet again,_ and leaving Leo without any support at all.

Then, Leo caught sight of the _rat-that-is-big_ staring out through a portion of the wall that _moved_ , and he decided sleeping more didn’t sound quite as bad as he’d thought.

Leo retreated, chasing after Raph quickly and tossing a warning hiss over his shoulder at the rat watching them go. Better to go be hungry but unwatched with his brother than stay in the open where anyone could see.

Leo only relaxed when he heard the sliding part of the wall click shut again, and he and Raph returned to the one part of their new territory that was exclusively _theirs._ A somewhat grumpy mostly silly play-fight later, involving quiet growls and making an even bigger mess of their bed as they rolled around- Leo felt a little less sore about losing the too-quick fight with _Mykey._

 _Mykey_ had cheated anyways. Leo would just get his brother next time in a fair fight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and then much later on Klunk becomes Claw and jokingly suggests maybe she should try hunting-chasing Leo and Raph, and the boys sweat audibly as a very big cat lady bares a lot of very sharp teeth at them.
> 
> also: Mikey is the ultimate cat lover. it is him.


	15. fanart!!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> coming back from the dead briefly to share a COOL THING

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i got given a comic from a REALLY NEAT FAN, who likes this series a lot still, and how could i NOT share it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please consider this TU canon, it's beautiful and i will treasure it always.

**Author's Note:**

> leave them comments in the comments, folks.


End file.
